Nevermore's Poetry

[Cicero]

1. I hate myself for not noticing this thread sooner.

2. You are awesome.

3. I only read the poems of your first thread by now, cause there are a lot man. xD

4. I loved them, from the first poem off it showed... personality. Your flow is great man, seriously, but not to price things into heavens.

5.

Originally Posted by Sorrow

Your poems remind me I should get off my lazy ass and start writing some.

This.

6. Keep it up. ^^

[Nevermore]

Originally Posted by soraking10

wow these are all exelent, they have great emotion within the words and i can feel the emotion come right into my heart.

Thanks so much!

Originally Posted by Sorrow

Your poems remind me I should get off my lazy ass and start writing some.

You should know, I still have the sniper trained on the back of your head :P

Originally Posted by Cicero

1. I hate myself for not noticing this thread sooner.

2. You are awesome.

3. I only read the poems of your first thread by now, cause there are a lot man. xD

4. I loved them, from the first poem off it showed... personality. Your flow is great man, seriously, but not to price things into heavens.

5.

This.

6. Keep it up. ^^

Thank you very much, and I certainly will!

[Nevermore]

Hey, I finished a new poem! See, I work on stuff, it's proven fact now :P

*****

Reflection in the Shattered Ice

As winter's bell softly tolls
And gossimer flakes begin to fall
As the wind's whisper slowly rolls
Across the faces of lifeless dolls

These large dolls dropped, one by one
Like omens from the overcast sky
At a pace slower than a snail's run
While the singing sparrows flew right on by

Down below, a floor of ice
That shimmered in a place without light
Waited not once, not twice, but thrice
For these cryptic creatures to escape its sight

Yet one by one their faces met
Before their ragdoll bodies broke through
So the broken pieces followed and set
Reflecting more than just the water's blue

They mirrored a far-off, distant past
A time when these dolls were once something more
The image burned into their hollow cast
As they made their way through fate's humble door

*****

Hope you all liked it!

[Kaos6]

Awesome. Completely awesome.

If you put these in a book, I would buy it, and usually I'm not really into poetry too much. ^.^ I look forward to more!

[Cicero]

The last one wasn't your best, if I'm honest. Nonetheless good, though. As I said before, it shows personality...your poetry is so much different then everything I've read up till now. Its like a nice breeze through my dogma filled view on poetry, so to say. Relieving.

[Nevermore]

Lol, I admit that this wasn't my best. I was basically going for an alternate depiction of "your life passing before your eyes when you die." I like how it turned out, lol.

Thanks for the input!

[Essence of Elegy]

Originally Posted by kazukifafner

Hey, I finished a new poem! See, I work on stuff, it's proven fact now :P

*****

Reflection in the Shattered Ice

As winter's bell softly tolls
And gossimer flakes begin to fall
As the wind's whisper slowly rolls
Across the faces of lifeless dolls

These large dolls dropped, one by one
Like omens from the overcast sky
At a pace slower than a snail's run
While the singing sparrows flew right on by

Down below, a floor of ice
That shimmered in a place without light
Waited not once, not twice, but thrice
For these cryptic creatures to escape its sight

Yet one by one their faces met
Before their ragdoll bodies broke through
So the broken pieces followed and set
Reflecting more than just the water's blue

They mirrored a far-off, distant past
A time when these dolls were once something more
The image burned into their hollow cast
As they made their way through fate's humble door

*****

Hope you all liked it!

Agreeing with Cicero, somewhat, although this one was great. It's got a nice flow, too, but that's to be expected.

I'm outta inspiration right now, so poems are at a standstill for me.

[revarai20]

I really like your poems. You definately have talent from what I can see. Especially the 'Something Lurks' poem, that's my favorite so far. =]

[Nevermore]

Hello, everyone! Don't you love just how quick and speedy I am!

:E:E:E

Anyway, here's a longer one that I've been working on. It's more of my entertainment/story variety (like Cleansing Rain, Luminance, and Something Lurks), but more of a tragedy than a comedy. Anyway, I used the style that I used with Swirling Red Wine, just to give it another shot, lol. Hope you like it.

Also, feel free to take the opportunity to tell me if the free verse is working, or if I should go back to my usual method of writing poetry.

*****

Can You See That Lonely Gun on the Floor?

Can you see it?
Upon these long-forgotten floors
Brushed with an endless trail of red
The memories of the past reveal
Themselves
Recalling the sad events that would never be recorded
In the Annals of History

The sounds that accompany them
Can you hear them?
The faint echoes of the city reverberate off the walls
The deep breaths of a man clinging to life
And the constant droplets of deep, dark red
Drip . . .
Drip . . .
Drip . . .

And so, on his knees, he rested
As his blood oozed from his wounds
Gasping
For breath
His hand clutching firmly
A gun painted with the Black of Onyx

His mind was consumed
Utterly consumed
With thoughts of revenge
Against the people that did this to him
The people that changed him

The Perfect Weapon
That's what they called him
That's what he was to them
That's all he was to them
A mess of prosthetics
And an over-stimulated mind
. . . that's all . . .

Yet here he was
All broken and bloody
As he stood for one final time
To make one final march
To strike them down with the power
That they bestowed on him

He moved at a slow and solemn pace
Towards the silver door
That separated him from his goal
A thin
And indifferent
Slab of metal

The cold of the gun ate at his hand
As he reached for the knob
That inviting knob
His heard was pounding
Thumping in his chest
In his throat
His body was shaking
From his desire and hatred of this moment

The door swung open loud and harsh
His ears assaulted by its crash
His feet drenched in a pool of red
Though the red
Was not his

They lie on the floor
Long since dead
The objects of his revenge
Were long since gone
Then one stood behind him
The Angel of Death

His color was clear
Yet he was so easily seen
And his faultless eyes
Were none so deathly
Though he grabbed the man's collar
And lifted him high
The man's gun
Still clutched in his hand

He was carried away
Far beyond the stars
Far beyond the edge of what is known
And later that day
His body was found
Just inside the door
A single bullet in his brain
And the lonely gun on the floor

*****

Again, more will be added when they are ready :P

[Azia]

Originally Posted by Kaos6

Awesome. Completely awesome.

If you put these in a book, I would buy it, and usually I'm not really into poetry too much. ^.^ I look forward to more!

(I find it's better to quote someone, than to steal their lines)

You really should put them in a book, though, and DEFINITELY get it published. Do you realize how awesomely amazing that would be?

[Kaos6]

The free verse is definitely working for you imo. But then again, I enjoy all of your poetry, so I guess you can't rely on my opinion.

And yes, you're so speedy, I don't even have to subscribe to this thread to know when your next poem has been put up.

^.^ lol, please keep up the excellent work.

[Nevermore]

Alright, I thought I'd put up the poem that I did for King Sora X's contest. Not much else to say, lol.

Grinding Gears

My body is caught
Caught in cold, steel chains
Enveloping my body
Constricting my body
As do all the daily worries
The daily struggles
The daily problems
Of our daily lives

These dirty, familiar chains
Run through the gears
The slowly turning gears
In the very depths of my psyche
As they resist the daily worries
The daily struggles
The daily problems
Of our daily lives

But it became too much
And the restraints broke
As the lever was flipped
And the gears began to spin
Making the daily worries
The daily struggles
The daily problems
Of our daily lives
Grind against my skin

*****

That's all for now!

[Azia]

OMG, I really like that last one. Way much more better than any of my free-verse $#!+.......... I am so flippin' jealous of you, kazu-kun. You can actually write, where as I merely try and usually fall on my @$$. lol. you have definitely got to give us more.

[Nevermore]

Originally Posted by dragonrider932

OMG, I really like that last one. Way much more better than any of my free-verse $#!+.......... I am so flippin' jealous of you, kazu-kun. You can actually write, where as I merely try and usually fall on my @$$. lol. you have definitely got to give us more.

LOL! Thanks. Seriously though, just keep working and you'll get better. We all have to start somewhere, right?

[Azia]

Thx a bundle, Kazu-kun. It's always nice to have some encouragement, lol. Seriously, though, you need to at least try to get some of your stuff published.