Mental health and other issues

[Angelic Symphony]

Okay, first off I'm just going to say that I am not whoring for attention and the only reason why I am posting this is to get peoples opinions, not their sympathy.

Alright, back to the subject.

In the past two years my mental health hasn't exactly been perfect, and although I haven't wanted to admit it to myself, in the past few months I have and honestly, I have no idea what to do.

My mum has always told me that I need to talk to a consulor, and I have tried, many times, but I never manage to get comfortable, and because of my stubbon ego, I normally get into yelling fits with the doctor and stop talking altogether.

My family isn't perfect either. My brother is physically violent towards me, taking what ever chance he can get to let out all his problems on me. I've been sent away a few times because of this. And my little brother, unfortunately, is following in example, thinking that I'm an easy push over.

In the last two years, I've been attending school a lot less, and in the past months I haven't been to school at all. I recently went to a local teenage help center, called Headspace. It's a free place for kids to hang out and talk to an adult trained in that area.

Though the woman I have been speaking (and the only one I have been able to speak to) to has said to me that I need more professional help than she can give me, and also she has recently quite for another job, leaving me with a brand new person to discuss my problems with.

I have been diagnozed(sp?) with minor depression, major anxiety and major confidence issues (though none of these are obvious when I waltz around the forums). I find all of these difficult to live with, and when ever I think about it I end up getting myself all worked up again.

I've lived with situations like this before. My sister and cousin have had close to the same problems, and on many ocassions I have been the one to calm them down. But this seems more difficult for me than anything before in my life.

When ever I am in public areas I feel like crying and hiding away in my house, and speaking to my friends makes me feel really bad inside as well. Even when I speak to them online I'm shaking and I have no idea why. They are the best friends in the world.

In two days, the new school semester is to begin, and I'm to go in on Monday like any normal student. Just thinking about it terrifies me and I really don't want to go, but I love learning and I really want to learn, I just can't stand being in puplic areas.

The only places I really have any confidence in myself is on KHI and in my house. And I guess all I really want to know is if anyone has been in any similar position and/or if they have any advice to help me in any part of whats screwing up my life.

Also, sorry the major long post, there is just a lot going on. And please, don't flame just because you think I'm an attention whore, I can assure I'm not =)

[Noich]

My family isn't perfect either. My brother is physically violent towards me, taking what ever chance he can get to let out all his problems on me. I've been sent away a few times because of this. And my little brother, unfortunately, is following in example, thinking that I'm an easy push over.

this has something to do with there being three children, you being the middle. first children are usually the type to lead, do whatever they please. and the last child is usually "the baby", doesn't get in trouble most of the time because the parents are latched to the idea that "he doesn't know better or something". and studies show that middle children(you), are stuck in between without the benefits of either. sort of like a house guest that has to abide by all the rules.

as for the violence, next time the mess with you, give one a bloody nose. (thats just me though)

In the last two years, I've been attending school a lot less, and in the past months I haven't been to school at all. I recently went to a local teenage help center, called Headspace. It's a free place for kids to hang out and talk to an adult trained in that area.

you definitely need to stay in school, no matter what it takes. it WILL help you in the long run.

I have been diagnozed(sp?) with minor depression, major anxiety and major confidence issues (though none of these are obvious when I waltz around the forums). I find all of these difficult to live with, and when ever I think about it I end up getting myself all worked up again.

don't sweat it. just accept that that is who you are, and that you need help getting over these diagnostics. as for the confidence thing, i can say first hand that having a girlfriend\boyfiend helps.

When ever I am in public areas I feel like crying and hiding away in my house, and speaking to my friends makes me feel really bad inside as well. Even when I speak to them online I'm shaking and I have no idea why. They are the best friends in the world.

maybe you just don't like people, or something has happened in the past to make not want to be around them.

Also, sorry the major long post, there is just a lot going on. And please, don't flame just because you think I'm an attention whore, I can assure I'm not =)

no prob, you just wanted help is all.

[TheFreeshooterII]

this has something to do with there being three children, you being the middle. first children are usually the type to lead, do whatever they please. and the last child is usually "the baby", doesn't get in trouble most of the time because the parents are latched to the idea that "he doesn't know better or something". and studies show that middle children(you), are stuck in between without the benefits of either. sort of like a house guest that has to abide by all the rules.

as for the violence, next time the mess with you, give one a bloody nose. (thats just me though)

Oh God I Just Read That And I Thoought My God Hes Is Right
Why DO They Call Me a Baby When i am 14...............

[Angelic Symphony]

Thanks TLA, that really helps =)

[Noich]

you is welcome :D

[krexia]

Have you tried talking to a doctor? I don't mean a counselor, or a psychologist - I mean a psychiatrist, a medically licensed doctor who specialises in issues of mental health.

If you've been diagnosed with serious disorders you really should be seeing an actual doctor, not just a counselor. Someone who's dedicated their career towards helping people like you.

[Tremolo]

Aww man. That really sucks, Angelic Symphony.
I apparently have some mental problems that I just now learned about.
They're very minor though, yet my mom is making a big deal out of it. I hate it.
And maybe to help you out, you can try to see about getting a tutor instead of going to school.

[Forever Atlas]

Yeah, in reality you need professional help as Krexia said.

An online forum filled with people just as inexperienced as you are in life and for sure not any type of medical professional is on here, these places may do more harm than help you with your real issues.

[quitejaded]

Angelic, I am sorry. I never had any sort of anxiety issues, so I honestly cannot understand what is going through your mind. In fact, my mind works the opposite direction. I tend to be uninhibitted. That is, if I must do something or want to do something, I will do it regardless of "obstacles".

I can tell you I have been diagnosed with minor depression. Only to find out years later that its just ADD.

Hope you found some help.