Im 20 years old...the basics of women

[dr.korytco]

Originally Posted by Milkman

you might be gay.



or you're just way too shy.

It's a long story, but I like women, never had feelings for a man before. If I don't like women, then I don't like anything.

[Steve-o]

Originally Posted by Milkman

you might be gay.



or you're just way too shy.

Congrats on helping him none...

Basically when you meet a girl thats right for you you guys won't have a problem talking to each other at all...if the first girl you try to talk to doesn't work out don't lose hope because you too might have been totally different to start with. Also as they said above become friends with whoever it is first...time is a key element in building a relationship.

[violent_anger]

Try and remember how you acted around girls when you were seven. It was truly a golden age for all of us.

[Silent Avera]

Well I'm a lady, and I'm your age, <3 - and if a guy approches me, I'm expecting him to be a gentleman somewhat, you know to not look at my goodies, but to look at my face, and yes as has been said before, eye contact is a total plus; it means he is talking to ME, not my goodies.

Anywho, you sound sweet, and with a little bit of confidence, and trust me a little goes a long way, you can at least make small talk with a lady and work your way up from there. Of course there are some girls that can be rather rude, but they don't deserve your time at all, nope. Maybe talk to some girls in class since you'll see them on a regular basis, like ask them if they know what's going today, that's the usual conversation starter that happens with me at least.

Anywho, hope that helps ^_^ and should you stumble upon a rotten egg, just keep right on trucking :3 Confidence and (some) persistence can open just about anyone up, even if its for a few sentences at a time.

[~azure.requiem]

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Im at a young, ripe date age, and Im available ,and so are many young attractive women. I have had some set backs in life, and I get very tense .

When a woman looks at me my nerves stiffen up and hold my head down, when I move it up to look back my head jerks, my eyes widen ,and my heart races.

I do not know how to show affection, I am very spiritual but I have some life expression damages .

What do you do when a girl shows an interest in you and looks at you? Do you approach her ? Do you just look back and smile and then go back to being uncomfortable and red faced and looking like you are hiding ?

I don't know how to react to affection from a woman. My body is not used to smiling even...long story .

Any thoughts ? What do I do after the look?


Additional Details

Its hard for me to look at them psychically as well as mentally . I do not have brilliant convo themes either . I would not be able to comfront a women without stuttering and being red faced...so I guess Im screwed .


I'm not ugly , Im not Yul Brynner but I look like a guy that is way more tuff than I am . So women sometimes show an interest in me and I show them the wall barrier.

Any help from someone close to my age wold be appreciated.

~ *strokes chin in deep thought process* hm. i see. well, if there's anything you should make sure you do, it's make sure you look her in the eye. i, myself, am attracted to guys who are confident enought to be themselves and look me in the eye. if you do end up acting nervous and it's painfully obvious, some girls will notice it and pick up that you are in to them. some of us'll even be nice enough to try to comfort you. me, i like to go after guys that have the same intrests as i do. it definitely helps in the conversation area. if you are lucky enough to find a girl who happens to be your age and likes the same video games that you do, you're definitely in for a treat. girls find it irresistable when a guy is confident and others find it ridiculously cute when a guy gets nervous around us. so, what i'm tryin' to say is either way, you aren't screwed. trust me. a good majority of us turn all goofy when we get around guys, too.

[Enemy]

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Thank you , some guy told me to look at the breast and smile .

Don't do that.

you might be gay.



or you're just way too shy.

Gay people aren't shy around girls.

[JH]

Originally Posted by Silent Avera

Well I'm a lady, and I'm your age, <3 - and if a guy approches me, I'm expecting him to be a gentleman somewhat, you know to not look at my goodies, but to look at my face, and yes as has been said before, eye contact is a total plus; it means he is talking to ME, not my goodies.

Anywho, you sound sweet, and with a little bit of confidence, and trust me a little goes a long way, you can at least make small talk with a lady and work your way up from there. Of course there are some girls that can be rather rude, but they don't deserve your time at all, nope. Maybe talk to some girls in class since you'll see them on a regular basis, like ask them if they know what's going today, that's the usual conversation starter that happens with me at least.

Anywho, hope that helps ^_^ and should you stumble upon a rotten egg, just keep right on trucking :3 Confidence and (some) persistence can open just about anyone up, even if its for a few sentences at a time.

Goodies...?

Anyways, I've always had trouble conversing, not only with girls but with just about everyone. I guess the one tip I can give you is that when you want to say something, say it. If you constantly keep everything in your head, no one will ever know who you are.

[.:Raz:.]

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Thank you , some guy told me to look at the breast and smile .

XDDD

Don't follow all of the advice you hear.

[Grace Assassin]

People often give you specific advice on what to do around someone sexually attractive for you.

Let's try a scenario: Someone you like approaches you. Do you start a conversation with a joke or present a formal greeting?

My best advice: "When you come to a fork in the road, take it." What does that mean? Don't think, act. Just do it. What is "it"? I don't know, you tell me, it's different for each person. If you can let go of your self conscious nature, you can (as cheesy as it sounds) be yourself without having to worry about the consequences.

Who cares if she denies you or, worse, makes fun of you? Letting it get to you is the worst that could happen.

So don't go around looking for all of this self help advice. Just let things happen.

[dr.korytco]

Originally Posted by Grace Assassin

People often give you specific advice on what to do around someone sexually attractive for you.

Let's try a scenario: Someone you like approaches you. Do you start a conversation with a joke or present a formal greeting?

My best advice: "When you come to a fork in the road, take it." What does that mean? Don't think, act. Just do it. What is "it"? I don't know, you tell me, it's different for each person. If you can let go of your self conscious nature, you can (as cheesy as it sounds) be yourself without having to worry about the consequences.

Who cares if she denies you or, worse, makes fun of you? Letting it get to you is the worst that could happen.

So don't go around looking for all of this self help advice. Just let things happen.

Thank you everyone for the advice. This is a good community.

This quoted advice is original though, never heard it put like that before in that precise way. I think its sort of smart.

Great advice all around guys, thank you.

I think I am going to draw random women at college.

[JH]

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Thank you everyone for the advice. This is a good community.

This quoted advice is original though, never heard it put like that before in that precise way. I think its sort of smart.

Great advice all around guys, thank you.

I think I am going to draw random women at college.

If you're thinking of doing an 'eanie-meanie-miny-moe' thing, I wouldn't. Sure it'll let you decided which girl to go after, but if things get serious and the girl eventually discovers you just picked her randomly, it could start trouble.

I'd just talk to a girl you find attractive, see how that goes. If it doesn't go, try someone else.

[dr.korytco]

I got made fun of today because I asked a question in basic algebra, for me it was unrefreshed in mind, to everyone else it appeared to be review. I got scoffed at and mocked. Comments were made about me , and I was made fun of.

No one in the class takes the pace of the class seriously or the teacher who is from Russia and has a hard time , no one respects the class , and they degrade what we learn. I am horrible at math, I have not done it in years either. So I asked a question and I was made fun of.

I tried to ask it confidently , I sat up in my seat folded my hands and tied to sit up mostly straight but to also rest my arm . People laughed at me and or the teacher or just one mainly of both throughout. At first I asked a question , followed by my explanation and more questions . I tried to explain it, the problem and how it is done, I was just reviewing it all , but after the professor did not understand me and went off on a tangent , a long long tangent. He is from Russia does not know English well.

So I finally mustered the will to speak up in class, but its in a class that everyone will make fun of me if I speak up in it. I need to sometimes as my math sucks. People around me, and maybe not the whole class but quite a few made fun of me.

I have a learning disability and I can be drifty my parents think that I am special , and so I am used to being embarassed to an extent but it doesn''t feel good.

I did not turn red , or act timid throughout though, while on the spot I tried to maintain confidence, self respect.

This class and teacher is mocked laughed at every day so I knew that I was in for a rude mockery if I asked a question but I did it anyways.

[Snow Candy]

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Im at a young, ripe date age, and Im available ,and so are many young attractive women. I have had some set backs in life, and I get very tense .

When a woman looks at me my nerves stiffen up and hold my head down, when I move it up to look back my head jerks, my eyes widen ,and my heart races.

I do not know how to show affection, I am very spiritual but I have some life expression damages .

What do you do when a girl shows an interest in you and looks at you? Do you approach her ? Do you just look back and smile and then go back to being uncomfortable and red faced and looking like you are hiding ?

I don't know how to react to affection from a woman. My body is not used to smiling even...long story .

Any thoughts ? What do I do after the look?


Additional Details

Its hard for me to look at them psychically as well as mentally . I do not have brilliant convo themes either . I would not be able to comfront a women without stuttering and being red faced...so I guess Im screwed .


I'm not ugly , Im not Yul Brynner but I look like a guy that is way more tuff than I am . So women sometimes show an interest in me and I show them the wall barrier.

Any help from someone close to my age wold be appreciated.

Hmm...taking in all this information so far:

1. Just treat the girl as a normal person like she's one of your friends or have the friend of yours (who's a girl preferably) introduce you to the girl you are interested in or whatever.

2. I know you don't want to smile but do it but don't smile too big as if you wanna scare them. Just slowly smile a smile!

3.Try to control your thoughts and get yourself together and think about it before you approach the person if you known them and etc. and or meet up with them.

4. When a girl looks at you. It COULD and I mean COULD, like a maybe COULD means she likes you. If she stares at you alot, she can probably like you alot or think your handsome--if that's the case, way to go! And just approach her if you can.

5. For shyness, just talk to your friends or anybody else about it and ask them for what to do and so forth--aside from us but also just be yourself, calm and natural (or try to be), and try to find out what she likes while starting a conversation if you can manage with a friendly hello or hey.

Hope this helps, so that's what I got at the moment. Keep us updated though. :D

[Sam]

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

What do you do when a girl shows an interest in you and looks at you?

If you know that the girl is interested in you and you're interested in her, why wouldn't you start up a conversation? From there, maybe you'll discover that you have a lot in common and you get along great or maybe you'll discover that she's a complete bitch and you'd prefer to never speak to her again. Either way, you're not going to see any results unless you step up to the plate. As cliche as it sounds, trying and failing is far better than never trying at all.

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Do you approach her?

Is she attractive? Does something about her appeal to you? Do you doubt that she'll ever try to cut your penis off while you're asleep and throw it out of the window of a moving vehicle? Then yes, ****ing approach her.

Dude, flirting with girls and making friends isn't supposed to be a horrific experience -- if you're not having fun with it, something is wrong with you.

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Do you just look back and smile and then go back to being uncomfortable and red faced and looking like you are hiding?

Forgive me for saying this, man, but you're not in ****ing preschool anymore. The days where you handle mutual attraction with a member of the opposite sex by giggling, turning red and avoiding making eye contact are long over. So the answer is "no", that's not what you do, unless you want to look like a goddamn loser.

Originally Posted by dr.korytco

Any thoughts ? What do I do after the look?

If you want to talk to her then just ****ing talk to her. She's just a human being, so treat her like one and she's sure to appreciate it.

Finally, remember that the first time you speak to her is not as important as the last. When you first start talking to a woman, you get to decide whether or not you like her. If you don't, you don't continue talking to her. Let's assume that you do like her. Great -- now, everything that you say and do past that point is 1000 times more important than your initial approach.

It all boils down to one thing; be comfortable with yourself. Don't give yourself any reason to be nervous. Confidence is the sexiest thing in the world. It really is.

[Ð]

You know, I've never had such problems with girls. I'm usually right up there on the front lines with the opposite sex. Never once do I doubt myself or turtle. Those are the two worst things you could possibly do when it comes to women; do not ever turtle. It's almost imediatly apparent you have no self confidence what so ever and that will kill any attraction women will have towards you.

And if it doesn't, she obviously has a thing about submissive men and if you're willing to take the role of number two, then approach her and just start talking. Who knows? Maybe you'll find things easier when it's the girl in charge. This helped me in my first real relationship. After my time with my first ended, I suddenly had this huge confidence boost. Next thing I knew, I was 'on top' as it were in my relationships.

Now, as for advice... Whenever you see a girl who you think might be interested, just approach her as you would a friend. Don't approach her with the idea that you're looking for somebody. ( This I cannot stress enough. ) Just come to her with a nice friendly smile and ask her name. Focus on her eyes, no one loves a miscreant. When she replies, ask her how she is. Whatever her reply is, take it from there. Just have a nice simple conversation with her.

So many guys seem to have their eyes on nabbing that one girl on the first swoop. I find this silly because it just DOESN'T happen. There has to be some initial connection between you and the women. This could be thirty minutes of talking about any interests you share. This could be years of spending time with your best friend. It does't matter.

Now if you want some casual sex, now that's a whole different story...