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Old 05/20/08, 12:29 PM   #2176
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Default Re: CREATE A MEMBER version 3.0

Quote:
Originally Posted by Angel's Prayer View Post
hir
clever :D




I haven't been working on that Daxic-Xigbar fight at all since I posted that firs paragraph, and I'm not the least bit ashamed.
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Old 05/20/08, 05:31 PM   #2177
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I have no idea what the heck happened, but today i woke up with a sense of maturity. Sorry for all the double posts and unneeded information. It's all stupid and wasted your time, so again, I am sorry. I feel very foolish.

I have a question for you as well, Do any of you have a suggestion on how ari/Riax finds the exiled? I'm in the process of re-writing her back story, and came up with that question because I'm writing it in a non-chronological order.

I can't get on messenger for a while, my computer's acting up at the moment. So, until I can get on, the only ways to contact me will be through my email, myspace, or here.

I've got three scenes finished, here's the first, I'll wait until someone else posts to post another one:

Prologue

My Name is Ari. I'm sixteen years old and currently live in Twilight Town. I live alone. Because of this, everynight, one of my friends either stick around until I fall asleep, or sleep over. They all mean alot to me, and I know I mean alot to them. They do this, to try and protect me.

I used to have a family, like they do. But, not anymore. You see, I was born and raised in Bikanel Desert until I was ten years old. Both my parents were Al-Bhed. One day, some people came attacked our tribe, and my brothers and sisters and I were forced to watch as our parents were killed. My eighteen year old brother, Evan, and my fifteen year old sister, Angel, grabbed me, my nine year old brother Len, my seven year old sister Kalli, my four year old brother Brenden, and my year old brother and sister Sio and Ria. The two of them took us to a hiding spot they knew of nearby. Nobody else knew of it. Nobody else was saved.

Sio and Ria were both dead before we got out of the hiding spot. We stayed there for a week, then came out of hiding. Evan wanted to get us all out, so we grabbed what was left of our things, and ran. We traved for almost a year when we found our way to Twilight Town. By then, Brended was dead as well.

During our fourth month, a few men from the army came and barged into our house. Angel grabbed me, Kalli, and Len and we hid in the basement. Len was struggling against Angel, he wanted to go help our brother. He stayed to protect me until we heard gunfire. He ran out of the basement door, and the army men laughed as he tried to put up a fight. They took him and left me, Kalli, and Angel with Evan's corpse.

We had a quiet funeral for Evan two days later. The entire time, my two best friends, Avery and Carson held my hands. They slept over at my house for a week, to make sure I was okay.

We weren't ever bothered again. Soon after I turned fourteen, Kalli and Angel wanted to go back to our homeland, Spira. I wanted to stay. So, they left me here, and went back on their own. I stayed with Avery and his family until this year, when I could finally afford an apartment of my own.

My group of friends hasn't changed much over the years. In addition to Avery and Carson, there was Clary, Victoria, Tom, Eli, Tabitha, and Catassa. Catassa was the only other best friend other than Avery and Carson.

The wheels of fate, -the wheels of life- started that summer. It started with the death of Eli. After that, we just went on, looking for adventure. We had no idea what kind of an adventure we were getting ourselves into when we decided to search for the cause of Eli's death.


************************

So? How was it? Anything to add or change? Please tell me!
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Old 05/21/08, 04:27 AM   #2178
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Default Re: CREATE A MEMBER version 3.0

Quote:
Originally Posted by Knightflare View Post
Charxai - Records data for the Exiled and is a pretty decent fighter.
sounds good. XD at recording data.

but i think something should be in there about the fights he gets involved in.

kinda to explain charxai's character, he's in almost every street fight he can be. he's really protective of everyone in the exiled, after his girlfriend was killed by the O13's, he doesn't want anyone else to be hurt.

so he'd always be up there. and for some reason i see him dual-wielding pistols xD

but i got to think about it some more.
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Old 05/21/08, 04:44 AM   #2179
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Oh lol. The anime convention I'm going to this weekend will have an Organization XIII panel.


Kingdom Hearts: Organization XIII Track 3
Fan Panel
Organization XIII is looking for new
organization members. Larxene, Xigbar,
and Luxord will be judging the
candidates based on questions.



LARXENE! DIE! XD XD XD
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Old 05/21/08, 05:03 PM   #2180
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Did nobody -no pun intended- notice that I'm auctually gonna start being serious?

Quote:
Originally Posted by NobodyImportant View Post
LARXENE! DIE! XD XD XD
Hmph. And to think I called you Sensei...
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Old 05/21/08, 07:26 PM   #2181
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Would Charxai be considered Ansem in some ways? With the computer and data recording.
If so Critvox wants to be computar n3rd.
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Old 05/21/08, 08:36 PM   #2182
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Is that your character, SS?
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Old 05/21/08, 09:12 PM   #2183
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I'm not sure if there is a need to answer that...
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Old 05/22/08, 12:17 AM   #2184
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Sheesh, I just wanted to know.
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Old 05/22/08, 12:53 AM   #2185
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SS, PPK, plz keep the spam down.

and PPK, just to explain to you why larxene should die, zaverxi's goal in life is basically to kill larxene.

Quote:
Originally Posted by freewebs.com/charxaichronicles/zaverxi.htm
While still a human, Zaverxi(then known as Zavier) was always remote. During school, he was the broody one sitting in the corner as far away from the others as possible. He hated dealing with people, preferring his own company. No one ever wanted to get close to him because that's the vibes he gave off, glaring at anyone who approached. Because of this, he didn't have any friends, and didn't feel the lack.
His only chance to have a friend was with his cousin, a girl named Megan, but she died before he could try, and that's when he started closing his heart off, feeding it to the darkness, willing his heart to go away and stop hurting him so much.
So that's how he lost his heart, it was his own doing rather than having it stolen away. He actually has the memory of handing his heart to a dark being with red claws and glowing eyes. And so his nobody was formed. However, in doing so he was able to conceal a tiny fragment of his heart, the part that feels rage and hate. In the process, he has a bit of a heartless inside him, which makes him more savage than most.
edit: and SS, i made a website for the exiled. that's why charxai is the records keeper. idc if critvox is a computer nerd, charxai's really not that kinda person xD
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Old 05/22/08, 02:42 AM   #2186
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Oh.
Then I wanna be a computer nerd.
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Old 05/22/08, 07:50 PM   #2187
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AO - Oops. Slipped up. Crap. Oh well. Once doesn't hurt. I won't do it again. And, it says nothing about Larxene in there. But, the only deduction i've come up with for that, -in like 3 minuites might i add- is that, is it that Rexi (thats what I'm going to call him, my bro said it first) wants to kill Larxene, because she's like him? That's the only thing I can make out of that, at least so far. I'll think about it, and excuse me if I'm wrong. And tell me if i'm right or wrong. If you wouldn't call that spam, that is.

Edit: I almost forgot. I have finished a bit more of Ari's thingah, but as I said earlier, non-chronogically written, so It's only a bit. Tell me if you want to see it, and do you want me to make the prologue longer? Shorter? Keep as it is? Tell me any comments you have on it please.
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Old 05/23/08, 01:07 AM   #2188
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Default Re: CREATE A MEMBER version 3.0

*randomly pops up with a random story about X....

k thnx.

(narrated by Exiled chronicler or some other, Charxai most likely)

Little is known about X's origin. However, in spite of such, the Nobody known simply as X is one who shares the same strong ambitions that others of the Exiled possess. He (based on what we can identify{AP: not about that, pervs}) is diligent and hard-working, but conversely is somewhat dense and unsociable. And while certain other members of the Order have proven to be doubly so, X's behaviour seems to stem from an origin none of us know about.

In an attempt to understand What X truly is, multiple studies have been conducted on him by several of our members. (experiment montage :D) Many attempts have failed. It is noted however that many had described the results as if "something is barring us from discovering anything." These suspicious findings lead me to wonder if X is intentionally trying to prevent us from discerning his whereabouts, despite his passiveness towards the idea of conducting the experimentation in the first place.

Not knowing where we were to go from here, I conducted a meeting with the higher-ups regarding the matter. It should be noted that X's given element is memory, and his abilities center around the manipulation of such. It is ironic that we were unable to find any of his true memories, but then it is also perfectly understandable. The findings in the experimentations revealed that the dimension where X's Heart and Soul should be instead consists a vast quantity of memories. It was difficult to catalogue the sheer myriad of them, and there were few note-worthy. However, none of them seemed to help us get any closer to the truth about X.

With that, we decided to engage in a serious investigation. I had selected several members whose skills would prove indispensable in this investigation. The procedure was simple enough. Somewhere, somehow, X became a Nobody. We were simply going to find that place and hope to gather any information we could there.

A task easier said than done.

We once again explored the labyrinth of memories that constituted X, there we gathered important clues as to where X began his journey gathering memories. From that task alone, we were able to gather enough information to form a complete atlas of the universe we once lived in. It was apparent that long before X had joined us, he had been journeying far and wide in search of strong individuals whose powers and abilities he made his. The investigation was a long and daunting one, until finally we had found the place we had searched for.

It was a place once known as Ash town.









INTRIGUE! lol, this is what I could come up with at the moment. Bare with me as I try to organize my thoughts a little bit. There's a lot of possible stuff about X's past, and I'm trying to work out which I should use for the backup story. hehe.

So, how was it? Did it sound Charxai-ish enough?
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Old 05/23/08, 03:25 AM   #2189
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wow. great writing AP. and yes, it sounds 'charxai-ish'

that's very interesting, x is a very intriguing member. i'm definitely ready for more =D
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Old 05/23/08, 06:14 PM   #2190
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I'm sure you guys are used to me being gone on the weekends, but I won't be on most of today and probably all of Monday, FYI. I'll be bask asap, but, I've been dragged into an evil camping trip to yosemite this weekend which I didnt wish to attend. I'll be working on Riax's stuff all weekend though, if it makes you happy. Anyways, I just thought i should let you know about my extended weekend. And while we're on the subject, Starting In August, I'll be super busy. Cheerleading starts at the end of August. And I'll be gone July 11th, and July 21st to the 26th. Thx!
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