Destiny's Fate -

[Lectori Salutem]

Very good!!!

It's much better with the paragraphs.
I saw you used '&' one time, just a mistake I suppose?

[Princess of KH]

Yea, i didn't mean to use the '&'. Like Lectori said, it was an accident. I'm glad you liked it, Lectori! I'll keep up the paragraphs. I might have the next chap up today, but don't be surprised if i don't.

[Lectori Salutem]

Don't rush it!!!

Just let every one wait in excitment if you have to.....

[Black Rose]

omgsh im sooo late!!!

i loved those chapters! they're really good! lol sorry again for being late, but i can't wait to read the next chapter ^^

[Haku]

I can't wait to see how the next chapter turns out xD.

[Princess of KH]

Happy to see you guys are liking it so far! I'll try my best to get chap4 up today, but i have a busy summer schedule. Even though i don't have a job, it's possible!

[Princess of KH]

I'm back & i got chap 4! & everyone that reads this, please comment! I gotta know if you like it or not! So, hope you like it!

Chapter 4 : Confusion

“Anna!” Riku shot out of his seat and knelt beside her. He shook one of her shoulders gently, trying to get her to wake up. “Is, is she okay? What happened?” Kairi asked. Even though she saw what happened, she didn’t know what else to say.

“Sora, speed up the gummi ship. If she’s hurt, we need to get her to some kind of hospital.” Riku said quickly. He didn’t really know why he felt so protective of Anna. He stared at her, hoping with every breath in his body that she was alright. About a minute later, Anna opened her eyes, and she looked really confused.

“You okay?” Riku and Sora asked at the same time. Kairi giggled a little bit, but then she stopped, realizing that it probably wasn’t a good time for laughing. Anna sat up and looked at Riku, then looked at the floor. “Riku…” All of the sudden, Riku looked at Anna really weird. “It was you…”

“What? What are you talking about?” Sora asked him, not having a clue what Riku was talking about. “You’re the one that said my name." He looked at Sora. "In my dream, she's the one who said my name." Kairi realized that Anna was confused. “You can explain that later. Anna, are you okay?” Kairi said. “I’m fine. I just had a dream, though…well, I think it was a dream.” She replied. “What happened in it?” Sora asked.

“I saw myself standing at the shore on Destiny Islands, staring at the water. Then I heard someone ask me what my destiny’s fate was. I turned around, but nobody was there. That same person then said that not all fates are bad. I looked around again, but no one was there. Then, Maleficent appeared in front of me. She called me ‘Princess of Light’, and then a bunch of heartless came out of nowhere and started walking towards me. I held out my hand as soon as I saw them, and a keyblade appeared in my hand. Then I woke up.”

Sora looked at her with big eyes full of confusion. "You’re the Princess of Light?! How do you have a keyblade?! And can you explain everything else while you're at it?” Anna looked at him. “I’ve never heard of the Princess of Light before, and I don’t know how I have a keyblade, or if I even have one. And as for everything else…” Anna explained about how they were in a video game, about how they weren’t real according to Earth, and she told them about her life on Earth. They were a little confused, but got it for the most part.

“We’re about to land at Hollow Bastion.” Riku mentioned, looking out one of the windows. “Yes! I finally get to go to another world! Well, I’ve been to other worlds, but I was forced. So I finally get to go willingly!” Kairi said as she looked at Hollow Bastion from the window closest to her. Sora got in the driver’s seat and landed the gummi ship. As soon as the gummi ship’s door opened, Anna Kairi raced outside and looked at their surroundings. “It looks just like it did in the game.” Anna said under her breath. Sora and Riku walked outside and stood for a moment.

“You ready for another journey?” Riku asked Sora. “Yea! I just hope this one doesn’t take a long time.” Sora walked up to the girls who were still amazed at where they were. “Let’s go see Leon and everybody else!” He said, and then he ran off to Merlin’s house, with Kairi close behind. Anna just kinda looked at them as they ran off. “Hey, you okay?” Riku asked her. “Yea, it’s just, why am I the Princess of Light? I mean, I’ve never even heard of it!” She replied, looking a little confused. “We’ll figure it out later. Come on.” He said in a reassuring voice. So they both ran after Sora and Kairi. Butthey got to Merlin’s house before they found Sora and Kairi. They walked inside, expecting them to be there, but no one was inside. Not Merlin, Cid, Yuffie, Sora, or Kairi; nobody was there.

[Black Rose]

great chapter Princess!! ooh nice cliffhanger at the end; i wonder whats gonna happen next!

can't wait to read more ^^

[Krazy]

... um. I suppose you don't know, but you have a Sue on your hands. You'd better reign her in before the worst happens.

And if you have no idea what I'm talking about, wiki "Mary-Sue", and you will be enlightened. Other than that ... uh. This gave me a good laugh, and I'm probably going to die a horrible, gruesome death after this post.

... and, uh, "Destiny's Fate" is kinda redundant, ya' know? ... and, um, if people are telling you it's too long, make it longer.

:D;

Or you could completely ignore me. I think that'd be beneficial for all of us.

[GuardianOfHearts]

Um.

Yeah.

Krazy and I are going to join each other in horrible, gruesome deaths. But I won't care because, luckily for me, I don't have a conscience.

Your grammar is ... in need of some serious work. Your plot is thin. Your story doesn't flow like it needs to. It brought back not-so-fond memories of Eragon and Eldest, though, while it was entertaining, it not satisfying. In fact I think my heart might have shriveled. Just a little bit.

Get your character out, now, and burn her before she grows worse. Kinda like a fungus, or an infestation. She's a one-dimensioned character, and no one wants that around.

And, um, I don't really get while everyone else is complaining about how your chapters are too long. They're really short; I read them in about ten seconds. I don't know about you, but I kind of like it when chapters last longer than my yawns.

._.

Good luck.

[Princess of KH]

Ummm...ok? Think what you want, you're allowed to have your' own opinion, but if you don't like it, then don't finish the story, or do whatever. But, thnx for commenting. I asked you to, so you had the right to say whatever you wanted. Anyways...Thxn Angelsinflight! I should have chap 5 up in the next few days; my schedule is uncertain. Wait for it!

[Lectori Salutem]

Originally Posted by GuardianOfHearts

And, um, I don't really get while everyone else is complaining about how your chapters are too long. They're really short; I read them in about ten seconds. I don't know about you, but I kind of like it when chapters last longer than my yawns.

Ten seconds?
You're a faster reader than me, and I'm not that slow.....
you are kinda right though.....

[Princess of KH]

Hi guys! I was gone for a few days, but i got chap 5 done! Here it is & i hope you like it!

Chapter 5 : On Their Own

"Okay, joke's over. Come out so we can talk." Riku said as he shut the door behind him. Anna walked around, looking to see if they were hiding somewhere. "I don't think they're here, Riku. Merlin and Cid wouldn't hide just for fun, and I don't see them anywhere. I guess we’re on our own until we find them." She stood still, looking at Riku.

Riku walked over to Sid's computer. Sid must have been writing a report on the city's defense systems, but it wasn't finished. He turned around to ask Anna where she thought they might be, but she wasn't there, and the door was wide open. "Riku, hurry!" He heard her yell. He ran outside only to see Anna surrounded by what seemed to be around a hundred heartless. However, they weren't attacking her. They just stood around her, making sure she didn't try to run. He tried to fight them off, but only more appeared around her. So he stood still, knowing it was useless to try and fight. He looked over, hearing someone whistling from around the corner. Then Pete walked around the corner and stopped.

"Good job! You got one of the princesses, now to find the others." Pete said, looking at the heartless, then at Anna. Riku whipped out his keyblade. "What are you doing here?" He asked Pete, annoyed at the very sight of him. "Well, I'll tell ya why I'm here. Maleficent told me to round up all the princesses for her, and that's what I'm doin'."

"What did you do with everybody else?! Where's Kairi and Sora?!" Anna asked Pete, afraid of where they where. "I had my heartless round them up and put them in the dungeon at Maleficant's castle. Except for the little girl and that keyblade brat; they're somewhere else in the castle. But you don't need to know where that is." He answered her, almost laughing. Suddenly, Riku charged at him and hit him straight on the head. Riku was fast enough that Pete didn’t have time to call on any heartless. Pete fell to the ground, knocked out. He looked at Anna. "Don't move, and you'll be okay."

Before Anna could even nod her head, Riku was already fighting the heartless. He stabbed a neo through the stomach, and then slashed about five more in half in one swipe of his keyblade. A few more tried to jump on him, but he killed them before they could touch the ground. Three tried to grab Anna, but Riku stabbed one in the head and slashed the other to in half. Before he knew it, all the heartless were gone.

"Thanks." Anna said shyly. She was a little embarrassed that she couldn't protect herself. "It's okay. You didn't have anything to fight with, and you don't look like you'd use your fists." He joked. Anna laughed. "We better go to Maleficent's castle and get everybody out." He looked over at Pete. He couldn't actually kill him, because the King had other plans for him. Anna looked at Riku. "Let's go!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him along as she started running towards the castle. Once Riku could run beside her, she let go of his hand. They didn't run into any heartless on the way; Pete must have summoned them all to capture Anna.

"We’re here." Anna said as she looked at the castle doors. She opened the doors and ran in, followed by Riku. “Ummm, hopefully you know where the dungeon is, because if you don’t, we could be lost for hours.” Anna mentioned, looking at all the doors in the foyer. “Yea, I do. And I might know where Sora and Kairi are, too.” He opened one of the doors that led to a hallway and walked in. Anna followed closely, not wanting to get lost. He walked to the end of the hall and opened another door. This door led to the dungeon. “That wasn’t so hard.” Anna said, although she knew that if Riku didn’t know where it was, then they would have probably never found it. They walked down a few fleets of stairs and then they were at the dungeon hall.

“Let us out of here you creep! I mean it!” “Yuffie, be quiet! You’ve been yelling that for the past thirty minutes!” “I don’t care! I’ll yell it for the rest of my life if that old wacAnna and Riku could here Yuffie yelling and Cid telling her to be quiet. Anna almost laughed; it sounded really funny hearing Yuffie and Cid arguing. After following their voices, Anna and Riku finaly found the cell that everybody was in.

[Kairi3.0]

Its great cant wait until you are done with it
so I can read the rest

[Haku]

Great previous chapters, good job.