C.r.a.i.d

[Alaude Drenxta]

Yesh yesh yesh, too true. *starts to drool* More soon? 8|

[Ulti]

If I get a break soon-.-I only have big ideas and not on the details so the next chapter will take longer so waity

[Valentine]

UK strikes again! Bun-Bun Chan gives it a 10.75/10!

[Ulti]

Beware!!Looong Chapter ahead

CHAPTER 4

It has been a week since Surge has joined up with Craid. He has taught Craid a lot of new things. For instance, currency of the land. That was probably their biggest problem. Craid never had money in his life and Surge was a bum! To gain food and shelter on their journey, they need cash and quick. Maybe the town of Cedi will be of service to them…

“We will die of hunger before we even get to the heart of this land! Surge, you must tell me. Is there any SAFE and LEGAL way to gain money?!”

“Calm down kid. I am sure I can find us a legal way..heheh”

Craid was angered by Surge for his stupid attempts to gain money, called bits, for supplies. Being a hunk-for-hire, robbing, and “street tricks” as Surge called it, only made Craid more wanted by the authorities. Any more stunts like those and Craid will finally know what a jail is.

“Wait Surge. My sensors tell me we should check this town out…Cedi…I have no information in my database on this town.”

“We are at Cedi already? Making good time! But if you want to check into Cedi..I suppose..”

“What..Is it a bad town or something corny?”

“If you like fighting and bloodshed. Most dangerous town of all. Heck even the women will kill ya if there is even a wolf whistle! I can’t put on the charm..”

“Deadly. But like I said, if my sensors go off we shall go in there”

“Grrr! Have it your way but next time I get to choose the town”

Cedi appeared like the other towns they visited. Sure there were a lot more weapon stores and everyone was carrying guns, it was the same. As they traveled through the town, Craid noticed they were being watched..

“These people aren’t very friendly. It isn’t polite to stare!”

“Craid..you are a six foot tall human with a robotic tail and horns growing out of your head. Everyone stares at you”

“You know what I mean! They stare not in fear but hunger. Either we are the next meal or we are in a spot of trouble..”

Suddenly a piece of paper was pushed into his face. It was a picture of Surge and Craid. On the top of the paper it said “WANTED”

“This Craid is a wanted poster. It tells people who the authorities want. They get money for it too. Look at the price for our heads…Ten…thousand..bits”

“Wow. That is a lot. But then again we did cause a lot of trouble in the past week. So the people of this town want to turn us in for the bits. Then we should kill them..”

Surge slammed his fist into Craid’s head.

“Idiot. The more we kill the more people want to kill us. Death isn’t always the answer. We just need to get out of here..Unless your sensors go off agaion..Told him this was bad..”

“They are going off which means something relating to the murderers is here! I just know it! And I am not moving anywhere until we get a clue!”

As if fate granted wishes, a yell came from a small crowd of people. Out of it came a young girl, around her preteen years. She had orange hair tied up in a ponytail. Wearing cargo pants and a skimpy top, she was fairly cute. Her giant gun that she pointed at Craid and Surge was a turn off though.

“You…Creepy man! You are Craid right?”

“..Yes. I am the one called Craid. I assume, with that gun, you are wishing to kill me?”

“Duh dummy. You are the most wanted men around! You are really stupid if you didn’t know this AND walked into a bounty hunter town!”

Craid gulped and looked slowly at Surge. He had his arms crossed and was wearing a “this-is-all-your-fault” look on his face. Craid turned his gaze to the girl.

“Look, I don’t want to hurt you. I have a chip in my head that tells me to never harm female creatures. So if you please drop the weapon, we can settle this out in a safe and friendly..”

A volley of bullets stopped Craid in mid sentence. He grabbed Surge and jumped up to a wall, bounced off of it, bounced off the opposite wall, then bounced onto the roof.

“way…..I see words won’t help here. Come on Surge!…Surge?”

Surge, sadly for Craid, was in the arms of several female bounty hunters. It seemed he was trying to talk his way out of the trouble he was in.

“So..how is the weather for you lovely ladies? I see you have strong grips..urk..and hurtful…ones..too..augh..Sorry Craid. I think I am “tied up” at the moment..”

“Fine. Have fun with your girlfriends”

Surge was about to yell at Craid for that comment, but Craid was already back on the ground. He swished his tail around, creating a dust cloud. He extended a claw and taunted the girl, the very taunt he did to the water demon.

“Come and catch me if you can!”

“I will! I have been trained for this day! You are my first bounty and I will claim you. Don’t worry..My father will make sure there is no interference”

She nodded to a man who seemed to be as big as house. His arms were like steel supporters and his chest was as smooth as glass. If Craid wasn’t told it was her father, he would have mistaken him for a statue. Craid grinned and waved at the man. The girl’s father didn’t move. His stare was focused on Craid’s tail.

“Nice man..But no interference is ok with me. I won’t kill you, just so you know. I am far beyond killing to solve my problems”

The girl didn’t bother to reply. She straightaway continued shooting at Craid. Craid maneuvered around the pattern of bullets. It was obvious to him that the girl was not ready to hold a gun that size, let alone any weapon. But he knew he shouldn’t attack now. Unlike a gun, he can go on forever…He just wished the gun ran out of ammo soon.

“You done yet little one? I am getting bored of this dodge ball game. This is a good experience battle I take. Soon you will run out of ammo..What will you do?”

Craid was right. A few seconds after the word ammo left his lips, the gun made a “click-click” sort of sound. The girl, probably in anger, tossed the gun onto the ground. Her orange hair was full of dust and her clothes were very dirty.

“…Father never told me what to do after this..Never got that far!..You..You should be dead!”

Craid looked himself over a few times before answering the girl.

“I don’t feel dead..”

“Aye! Denum! Idiot! I mean you should be dead. Not actually dead.”

“Anyways, does this mean I am free to go? And Surge?”

He pointed to his blue furred pal, who was in a headlock of a blonde woman. Craid laughed and called out to Surge.

“Only bit of advice Surge! No blonde jokes ok?”

“I’ll keep that in mind…if I get to keep it after she is done with me. Just hurry up Craid..I always wanted to be in the arms of a beautiful woman, but this is just wrong..”

When Craid turned his head back to the girl, she was gone. Not entirely though, for she was now right in front of Craid, banging on his chest. This hurt her more then Craid, since he was part machine. The girl’s hands became red and sore. She fell to the ground and began to sob. Craid’s annoyance quickly fanished. He couldn’t stand to hear crying children. He always wanted to make them happy when they did, like when Yame got a cut. He bent down and patted her head.

“There, there. I am sorry that you couldn’t kill me. I need to stay alive so I can kill some bad people. Stop crying please..”

Craid never knew if she stopped crying next because..well..he couldn’t remember anything at all. The girl’s father, taking Craid’s action as an attack, ran over and slammed his fist into Craid’s neck. He fell and collapsed into a heap on the ground.

It was like being lost in an ever lasting darkness. He couldn’t see, smell, hear, or say anything. In the distance, he could of swore he heard someone..calling him…Craid…Craid…CRAID!

Craid woke up with a start, almost smacking someone besides him. It was still dark, but all of his other senses were back. He noticed there was a large amount of pain spraying from his forehead. Craid couldn’t hold his swelled head because something forbid him to.

“What are these things that hold me tight and won’t let me go. They burn when I move too..grrr”

“They are called ropes metalhead.”

Surge’s voice filled the air. Suddenly a light lit up the room. It wasn’t too bad of a hostage keep. The door and only window was barred, but at least the hay on the ground kept them warm. Surge was tied up with rope as well.

“Err I knew that. So where are we anyways?”

“A place where they keep the bounty before selling them. Don’t try breaking out. The bars are electrified. I wish they didn’t take my saber..”

Craid struggled with his bindings, but this was some strong rope. It scrapped his skin and it hurt like metal splinters. With some moves with his tail, he got back on his feet and headed toward the only place where the light shone. The glass window let him see into the next room. It was a lot cozier then his room. There were a few couches and a table. The walls were covered in wanted posters, each one bearing a man uglier then the last. He once again saw the young girl, her father, and a man he never saw before. The man had snow-white hair and a mustache to match. He wore a green tuxedo, which was strange to wear in a town of bounty hunters.

“I will not have those petty criminals in my storage room any longer Croft!”

The strong looking man growled at the white haired man. Now that Craid was close enough to see him, he looked like a giant. His matted red hair seemed to droop a little.

“We have no choice Mayor Nazex! We needed to hold that thing in a place where it was strong enough. The wolf demon might not get out of a regular cell, but that monster could easily get out. You remember the words on his wanted poster. ‘Dangerous and deadly. Do not underestimate’. So I am doing us all a favor and keeping him in a safe place! Aerin! Go and give them their meal for today. Better be alive or we will never get the bits.”

So that was the girl’s name, Craid thought. He edged back from the door and plopped himself on the ground. The doorknob slowly turned and a delicious aroma entered the room. The young girl, called Aerin, was carrying a platter full of food. Surge was nearly slobbering like a dog when he saw the food.

“Yeesh. You guys are hungry. Don’t know why we have to give up the good food for criminals like you..”

Craid watched as Surge gulped down his share of the food. Craid only sniffed his and nibbled.

“Why do you keep calling us criminals? We have done nothing wrong but protected ourselves.”

“Sure. And I suppose Black Knights kill anyone at any given time! They attack the bad people and no one else! You did something bad and you know it.

Craid thought about this for a moment. What could he have done to anger so many people? Surge was trying to talk through a mouthful of food. He almost choked to death when Craid slapped his hand extremely hard on his back.

“I see. Surge says I killed a very important person. I was only getting Surge out of a predicament. Nothing wrong with helping a good person kill a bad one. He wasn’t very nice at all.”

Aerin felt like she was talking to a five year old. How could one of the most wanted men in Tarren be so naïve? She put two fingers to her head, rubbing a temple.

“That man was one of the richest men in this area. Killing him was a high offense! It doesn’t matter if he is nice or mean..He has power and others don’t.”

“So you would put a person who would kill innocent children in a high position and do nothing about it? A guy who would do nothing but sit around on his ass and laugh at the common folk?”

Aerin was about to respond but hesitated. He was right, she thought. The man was very cruel to people in his town. But Aerin couldn’t let him know that. A bounty hunter never sides with her bounty!

“..Look..just eat your stupid food. Someone will be here soon to pick you up. And then I will be a real bounty hunter!”

The girl stormed out and slammed the door. Craid looked at the door for awhile, then turned back to his food. It wasn’t very bad. Consisted of a sweet tasting meat with some fried potatoes. Surge already finished his meal, happily belching with satisfaction. Craid grinned and continued on with his meal. One question still lingered in his mind. Why does the girl want to be a bounty hunter? As far as Craid saw it, it was a rotten business. Capturing people because of bits…The humans were greedy things. Craid wanted to think more about this girl but something interrupted him.

“Get up ya filthy beast. Your master’s rookies want a good look at ya!”

Before Craid knew it, he and Surge were on their feet being lead by a chain rope. Just like a mutt..That’s what I am to them, thought Craid. They were lead outside of the house, just a few feet from it. Craid could only make out two people in the darkness of the night. They both were identical in clothing. Both of them wore leather pants, green tunics, and wore bright red scarves around their faces so only their eyes could be seen. He saw on the back of one of them was a quiver of arrows. The other held a bow.

“Wicked Archers..Perfect!”

“Explanation if you will Surge..”

“Bloody killers who work for the Dark Kingdom, like the Black Knight. Only these guys are faster, but less defense. Only work for one guy. His name is Captain Gyrun He isn’t a walk in the park either”

“Interesting. Why would he want us then?”

“Don’t ask me. Captain Gyrun is one twisted officer.”

The Archers looked at them. Craid could hardly tell if they were smiling or frowning. One of them walked right up to Craid, grabbing his chin and twisting his face around.

“Defiantly him. What other creature could be such as hideous has him?”

Craid lurched out at the Archer, but only fell flat on his face. He was still tied up with strong rope. The other Archer examined Surge. He spoke in a language new to Craid’s ears and spat on the ground.

“Why do you bring rubbish to us?! We only want…erm..that is too say. Good find on this killer demon.”

The first Archer had elbowed him in the back, changing his words. Craid raised an eyebrow, his tail flickered ever so slightly. Aerin’s father, which he learned was Croft, stepped up to one of the Archers.

“Now, where is the money we were promised? Ten thousand bits should be correct!”

He held out his hand, expecting the money to fly into his palm right then. The Archers just stared at him, then chuckled. Their laughs were as twisted as their hearts.

“How could you forget Croft? Until Captain Gyrun comes here, you shall have no pay. We do not want a fake like the last time that duren Hayl gave us!”

“DON’T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT MY WIFE LIKE THAT YOU SON OF A KURET!!!”

Craid finally understood Aerin. She wanted revenge. She saw it as his fault that her mother died. It was cause of him she died, for if he didn’t kill anyone, Aerin would still have a mother.

“I see now..I see now why I am being punished”

Everyone turned towards Craid. His head was facing downward and his whole body limped over.

“I killed an evil man, which was taken for badness. A young woman, trying to uphold justice, brought a mistaken man in custody. A man she thought was a killer and deserved to be caught. Died for nothing..That is why I am here. I deserve this and I am so sorry”

This caught Aerin off by surprise. He, a cold-blooded killer, actually apologizing? Ever since her mom died, she did nothing but train to kill him. Now, was this pity she felt for him? The Archers didn’t feel the same…

“Bwhahaha! What a pathetic being. Powerful but gentle as a mouse! Captain Gyrun doesn’t need someone like you—”

“Oh really now?”

A voice, as loud as a cannon firing, boomed across the scene. It seemed an earthquake began, but it was no earthquake. It was a mans footsteps…

“Ca-Captain Gyrun! Sir!”

“Silence you durens! How DARE you say what I need or not? That is not your decision!”

The man was taller Croft and had more muscles. He had a buzz hair cut, with a few amounts of red hair. He wore a navy blue top, short sleeved, and was torn up. Army pants finished his features, along with tons of battle scars. Gyrun was indeed frightening.

“So, they think this is the guy we want?”

“That’s..That’s what they tell us!”

“Well, I have a way to tell just like last time!”

Gyrun pulled out a gigantic blade, three times bigger then Surge’s saber. He ordered the Archers into a strange position. One held Craid on the floor while the other stretched out his right arm. Craid seemed like the only one who didn’t know what was going to happen next. His gaze turned to Surge, who was keeping his eye on the blade and his arm. When Craid understood what was going to happen, a mind numbing pain threw off his concentration. He closed his eyes, trying to keep in his yells. When he opened them, he saw nothing at first. Surge tried to say something, but he kept stuttering.

“Cr-craid. Your..Your arm..”

Craid quickly examined his arms. He almost gagged, seeing his stump of a arm. Gyrun had cleanly sliced his entire arm off! The blood gushed from his wound, like it would never stop. Craid winced once of twice. The pain was unbearable! The bounty hunters didn’t seem to like this action as well. They kept their eyes of his wound, but some were unlucky and were puking on themselves. Aerin was sobbing all over her father. Croft could keep a straight face.

“That..was unnecessary Gyrun”

“My way is different from yours. If he is truly Craid, then he would be standing up, ready to kill me. He is a pathetic copy again! I have warned you last time!”

“Anything but Aerin! She is all I have left!Please!

“How sad. She is going to die knowing her father is a coward and a trickster! Now bring her to me”

“Leave…them alone..or..I’ll..kill you with my other arm”

Craid was panting hard, but he still crawled on his stomach toward Gyrun.

“I don’t..need both hands to..kill you. Surge can fight..as well..as me.So go..away.you devil”

Gyrun was unmoved by his determination. All he did was laugh, like a bull’s snort.

“Welch! Fine, I’ll leave your friends alone as a dieing request. But after you die, I have no reason no not kill them. Archers! Back to the fort”

The Archers saluted him and followed behind him. Just as he was out of sight, the hunters untied Surge and rushed over to help Craid.

“Pal! Buddy! It is going to be ok! We’ll get you a doctor and bandages! Come on you people! Can’t you see he needs help?”

“No Surge. Leave them be…Just hand me my arm..”

Surge was puzzled at this request. But his friend was dieing and that was the least he could do. So he gave him his arm. What happened next bewildered everyone. Craid put his decapitated arm over his stump. It was like a dozen stewards were stitching his skin together. In less then five seconds, he waved his now connected arm back and forth.

“See? Good as new! What? Why are you staring?”

“Normal people can’t reconnect their arms!!!”

“Oh. Right. You see, this is what the R stands for”

“R??..Wait, you mean in your name?”

“Yup. Cyber Regenerating Artificial Intelligences Demon. I can regenerate body parts. Sweet huh?”

“Lifesaver. Could have told me you could do that in the beginning. I am just sick with you now. That was nasty”

“Hahaha! I’ll tell you anything about me. But first..”

Craid walked over to Croft and his daughter, Aerin. Craid and Croft stared at each toher for awhile, but Croft understood. He pushed Aerin out a bit. Aerin looked at her father, then back at Craid.

“I am very sorry about what happened to your mother. It is all my fault..”

“Not much..”

Craid looked at her in surprise.

“Like you said, bad people shouldn’t be in power. You, in a sense, did justice. My mom was just unlucky we saw that poster. You aren’t a bad man if you could save us from that evil man.”

“I protect the weak and good. You feared the man, Gyrun was it? So I just thought you were doing it out for fear. But I can’t talk right now. I have to be going. I have something to do..Hey! Don’t worry. When I get back, I’ll show you some awesome moves friend!”

Aerin giggled a bit and nodded. Craid turned to Surge, who was now reunited with his saber, and left for town. The entire town waved them good-bye as they left as dawn broke.

“Why do we have to leave so soon? We need to rest and..Those girls were starting to like me!”

“We must follow Captain Gyrun as quickly as we can. I can still smell my blood on his sword”

“But why? Why so soon? I mean, we could rest a day and then continue.”

“The faster the better. As for my reason…he knew I could regenerate”

“Makes sense. Why else would he slice off an arm? You don’t think..”

“I do. He knows what I am. He knows what I can do. So he must know everything about me. He has my answers..Whats wrong Surge?”

“You..aren’t really going to go back to play with Aerin. Are you?”

Craid turned his body around to face Surge. His face wasn’t as care free anymore. It was serious and cold. It meant a lot to Craid though.

“Soon? Not really. I’ll come back if my mission is completed. I think that is impossible now.”

Craid took a long look at his right arm. He shuddered at the thought and continued down the road with Surge. He knew, as long as Surge was willing to help him, he has a higher chance of fulfilling his mission.

[Hokage]

Whoa... Man.. I forgot how good this story was. It was very excellent UK. I'm loving how you make the characters interact with each other in thier own special ways and the detail you have. Very nicely done. Captain Gyrun sounds like an awesome villian and I can't wait to see what he has in store for Craid and Surge.. Surge... My favorite character.. The best way to get out of trouble with women is complimenting and being extremely nice to them.. Surge knows his stuff =D. Well I shall conclude this post now. I do have one more thing to say though. If it takes that much time everytime to make a chapter like this.. then I suggest you do that everytime because this one was super great. Good Job and update when you can. Peace out.

[Ulti]

Nothing but the best from me=PAll you gotta do is help me get fans. This chapter went better then I thought. Gyrun isn't going to be any better then he is. Human characters are hard to describe. To those confuse on how I shall do the villians, in each land(3 or 5) I'll have 2 captains and 1 general. So this will be a very long fan fic. Keep reading my fans!

[Cael]

UK that was a great story =D and a long one since I just started reading it yesterday xD I can't wait for chapter 5 ^^

[Ulti]

After a long waiting time, I present Chapter 5! And its a TO BE CONTINUED!!!!!!

CHAPTER 5

Darkness soon fell on the land of Tarren. The moon was at its highest peak when a bell rang out. It rang twelve times. The ringing came from a castle, twisted as a murderer’s mind. It was nearly 10 stories tall, with a post at each end. A moat surrounded the castle, with an eerie lump of land that slowly moves up and down around the moat. The inside of the castle wasn’t much different from the outside. It was as dark as a black cat with only a few candles lit. Statues of the same man were placed everywhere. Pictures of the owner of the castle’s dead relatives were scattered through the rooms of the castle. A white haired man, seeming to appear out of nowhere, came running down the halls. He was carrying a plate of food that was spilling everywhere. Finally he reached the throne room, where a dark figured rested in the throne. The man placed the food in front of the figure and bowed.

“Your supper sire. It is as cold as your heart!”

“Good. The colder the better..I always say! Copy that down for the records!”

The white haired man pulled out a scroll and a pen. He quickly copied down the sentence and placed it in his coat pocket. The man was about to leave when the figure called to him.

“Any news on the search? I am getting angry with the failure of my troops. I know he is on this continent..”

“Well..s-sir..We are trying our best but he is very quick. We almost had him at the tavern but the Black Knight failed..”

“Failure is the last thing you can do for me. I want him in my castle soon. General Yazn will be displeased if he hears my Archers can’t do a thing right. They will all be slaughtered. I don’t want to lose my army..”

“I know sir but all we find is his look alikes. He was based on common humans after all. But the last one..”

“The last one is probably dead. If he was Craid, his arm would have been reattached right then and there. Still I am curious… but it’s too late. I want two more of my Archers to raid the next town. Now get out of my sight!”

The white haired man jumped at the sharp command. He gave a slight bow, almost falling over in fright, and fled back into the darkness. The man on the throne then got up, quietly heading for the window that overlooked the land he owned. No trees grew on the land. Not even a single flower decorated the barren ground. Suddenly, like magic, a single flower petal landed on the sill. Grinning, the man picked it up then tore it in two. Rolling the two pieces into a single ball, he threw it toward the ground. Amazingly, the petal sped toward the ground like a bullet and smashed into the ground like if it was a rock, leaving only a crater. He was a powerful man. He was none other then Captain Gyrun! Strongest man in all of Tarren and the only man who can control the Wicked Archers! He should have found that son of a bot weeks ago! Where was he?! And how dare he hide away from his fate! Unknowingly to him, Craid was closer then he thought…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Are you sure that we are on the right trail?”

“Who is part wolf? Who has a nose that is twice as good as any human? Me. Not you”

“I still think we are heading the wrong way. This place is deader then Death itself!”

“I told you I can find it! Its not like you are capable of doing this..”

Craid’s anger grew a bit. He almost reached out to smack him but stopped short.

“If your nose is so good we would be at Captain Gyrun’s lair! I guess you aren’t as hot as you think you are..”

“Just you watch you big lummox…Just you wait”

Craid kicked a rock down a small hill in anger. As it fell, Surge suddenly took off. Obviously Craid wasn’t paying any attention to him. In fact, Surge wasn’t even paying attention! He kept running and running. I’ll show that big dumb bell that my nose is never wrong. I wouldn’t be the pimp that I am without it! Finally, Surge started to slow down to a halt. He looked behind him to find he was alone.

“Great. Just great. Craid isn’t even here! He probably couldn’t keep up. Heh, I am faster then I thought!”

A sharp pain from his foot. He cried in agony, hopping on one foot. He quickly pulled the object from his bare foot. Blood dripped from the wound as Surge examined the weapon. A simple arrowhead. And where there are arrowheads, there are…

“Wicked Archers. Perfect. At least I know I am near Captain Gyrun’s lair. I knew my nose never fails me. Since I am here I might as well knock on his front door. I can take him. I don’t need a super being to save my skin again. I am no mutt but a true wolf!”

Surge raced toward a patch of land where arrowheads laid. It only took a few minutes of running before Surge saw the castle. It was as horrible as it was at night. Only this time the draw bridge was down and Archers guarded each post on the castle. So much for knocking. Even I can’t survive that many arrows. There has to be some sort of secret entrance. I mean, all baddies have another entrance where the hero makes a surprise attack with it! Surge, however, found one. This one was a fool’s risk. The only entrance was a pipe that traveled into the castle’s water supply. This pipe was located under the draw bridge directly in the moat. Surge saw no other choice so he quietly crept toward the moat. Now this was very hard to do. It was broad daylight and Surge had nowhere to hide. Luckily for him, being a wolf demon, he had the ability to transform into a wolf. His wolf form wasn’t too different from his human form. He had the same colored fur as his hair but his eyes were moon yellow. Small cuts were scattered all over his body, especially around his muzzle. A wolf wouldn’t be too suspicious. They will just think I am here to get a drink of water. Once they turn their attention off me, I dive in. Indeed his plan was working. He got right up to the moat without any arrows targeting him. Surge went through with his plan and started to take a drink from the moat.

“..Something isn’t right here..”

He lifted his muzzle and turned his head to the nearest post where an Archer waited. He was laughing at something. But what? Surge snorted and got ready to dive in. Awaiting him was a long, green, spike covered claw.

“Oh..sh—”

The claw, with quick reflexes, grabbed Surge’s torso and pulled him underwater. Surge tried to struggle out of the creature’s grip but it was too strong. When he opened his eyes, he saw the creature as neither demon nor animal. It had the head of a giant croc but the body of a snake. Spikes covered its entire body, two fangs jutted out from its bottom jaw, and had blood red eyes as big as Surge’s paw. Definitely not demonic. Must be a mutant like Craid. Humans..they think they can rule everything. The mutant looked at Surge hungrily, tightening its grip on Surge. Being a wolf underwater wasn’t Surge’s ideal choice of an activity, so he reverted back to his human form. He tried to swipe at the creature but the water slow downed his attacks. Fighting isn’t an option I see. I’ll have to make a break for it! Something pierced Surge’s leg. It was the arrowhead that he stepped on before! He tore it out of his pants and stabbed the creature right on the snout. It roared in agony as its blood spread through the water. Taking this chance, Surge started to swim toward the area where the pipe laid. The mutant saw him trying to get away and followed him. It was a lot faster then any croc or snake or anything Surge had ever seen before. Finally, the pipe was within reach. Just when he grabbed onto the side of the pipe, a great deal of pain ruptured in his right leg. The mutant had caught up. Its razor sharp teeth quickly tore through his flesh, drinking the blood that entered its mouth. He couldn’t pull himself free. Then Surge got an idea. He ripped the arrowhead from the mutant’s snout and threw it as hard as he could at the surface. When it broke through it continued to speed toward the sky. As if fate pitied Surge, a Wicked Archer saw this.

“..Grrr..Someone must be trying a sneak attack. Stupid croc monster wasn’t worth the gold. At least it well get a raw meal…heheh..”

He placed an arrow in his bow and pulled back on the string. With a sly grin, he released the arrow into the moat. Fresh blood floated to the surface. With a sneer he turned back his attention to the land. He knew his target hit, but the wrong target. Down in the depths of the moat, Surge was nowhere to be seen. The only thing there was the mutant creature, with a single arrow through its head. Instant death. Surge had escaped death and entered the pipe. The pipe lead Surge into the sewers of the castle.

“Beats the moat at least. And it leaves that toilet water aftertaste! Now on to business..”

Unsheathing his saber from his belt, he continued on through the castle. Soon he got to the darkest area of the castle. It was bright enough for Surge to see parts of the hall, but not all of it. Walking toward a wall, he spied a painted picture on it. Using one of his claws, he scratched a goatee and a mustache on the picture.

“Someone is full of himself. Or his family. A lotta photos. I smell Craid’s blood so Captain Gyrun must be near. Now I can get Craid’s vengeance…and mine.”

With a burst of speed, he fled toward the darkness of the hall. Finally he came to the throne room. Though the scent of Craid’s blood was all around him, he didn’t see the sword or Gyrun. Surge’s tail twitched as he walked around the room. It was colder then the rest of the castle and darker. Something inside him told him to run but he trudged on. He felt warm air on his neck. He spun around to only see darkness before him. With a heavy sigh he turned back, only to scare himself silly. Before him was the bode of Captain Gyrun.

“Well well well. What do we have here. A mutt in my castle!”

“Who are you calling a mutt! You buffed up baboon! I came here to kill you not to be insulted!”

“Hm.. Oh yes! You were that wolf demon that was with that boy I killed.”

“Killed? He is…Yes. That’s right. He’s dead as you will be!”

He pointed his saber at Gyrun’s chest. Gyrun made a “huk huk” sound that Surge took as a laugh. Surge could barely see but he heard the sound of metal sliding across leather. His sword was being drawn now. Well this sucks. I can’t see the darn guy. At least I can smell him. He didn’t wash his sword yet. Sweet sweet irony…Surge spun his saber around his fingers.as he walked along the stone floor. Indeed he could smell the blood on his opponent’s blade. It was good enough for Surge. With a twist of his wrist, he struck his saber into total darkness. The sparks from the two blades meeting filled the room with light. Another spray of sparks filled the room. Neither sword met the skin of the enemy.

“You are a very good swordsman demon. If you come off this battle with at least one arm, I’ll let you join my army. A good sword is needed among my Archers.”

“I rather be food for your moat beast then join your army..”

“So be it demon! If you don’t mind, I’ll turn the tide of this battle!”

Surge didn’t hear, smell, or see anything different. He took a lung at Gyrun only to miss. He tried again but missed. What did he do to enhance his speed? It’s twice as fast as before. Or maybe he can smell me too now.. With a single slash, Surge felt all his blood rush to his side. He reached to feel how big his wound was. It wasn’t deep but very long.

“How very clever. You can either smell me or see me better. So which is it you baboon?”

“You are correct. I can see you very well demon. You might have heard of these goggles but I highly doubt it. Lets just say they can let me see even in the darkest abyss.”

Surge recoiled at the thought. How could he fight now? Gyrun can see him while only he can smell him. At least it’s a chance. I can smell my own blood on him, which is just as good as his “goggles”. Surge took a step forward to take another charge at him, but suddenly the scent was gone. Well not entirely. It was a different scent that was all over the room. It was hard to tell Gyrun’s scent from the rest.

“I am so sorry but I forgot your nose is sensitive. And for me to spread yours, your friend’s, and my blood all over the room. How rude of me to hurt your nose demon.”

“..I don’t need it to kill you! I am taking my revenge on what you did!!”

With all his strength, Surge ran into the darkness, slashing at anything. He found no target but he was found. Another slash to his side finally brought him down. His whole body shook from the blood loss. He heard Gyrun chuckling behind him. No. I can’t fail now. I will not let him survive after what he done to..I just can’t!

“The wolf is whimpering like a puppy. Sick twist of fate eh? Well you came to look for a fight and you got it! Didn’t think it would be this hard to defeat a Captain mutt? Well I’ll take your offer to feed you to the beast of my moat.”

“It was sarcasm you denum! The moat monster is dead. Too bad you didn’t make its armor thick. A single arrow took it down..”

Gyrun did not grin anymore. He grinned his teeth and picked up Surge by his neck. It was obvious to Surge now that Gyrun was very strong. He didn’t even sweat when he put pressure on Surge’s neck. Even after that battle he didn’t get tired. I can’t defeat him with my handicapness…There is no way I can even lay a scratch on him.. I have failed you..father...

“I have failed.. I can’t do it.. I am a lousy fighter whose sword should be taken away from!”

“I know you can be an idiot and perv Surge, but you aren’t weak. Just having a trouble without an old friend.”

Surge’s ears perked up. He looked all around him but he didn’t see anyone else. Even Gyrun was curious to who had suddenly joined them. The answer came to them like thunder. A huge section of the east wall was suddenly blown away. Out of the rubble came Craid. Bearing his grin on his lips, he dusted himself off.

“Sorry but did I miss the party? And how come I wasn’t invited!”

“Craid!”

“Craid?!.. So you show yourself at least Craid. I guess I was wrong back at the village. At least now I can see if your skills are as they said..”

“Correct. My creators told you right. So mind telling me how you know them?”

Strangely, Gyrun became to laugh. He dropped Surge to the floor and laughed even harder. When he finally stopped, he took off his goggles and glared at Craid.

“If you want to know that information, you will have to defeat me, the great Gyrun, in battle. If you win, you may learn this information. But if I win, you will come with me.”

“Fair. But I am a tad curious what will become of Surge?”

“If he has a beast form, it would make a nice fur coat. Or maybe he can be target practice..”

Craid, with a flash, ran right in front of Gyrun. He held a claw to his throat.

“Win or lose you will heal him. Then let him go. He does not get involved in this..Deal?”

“Deal. I will beat you here. No running away and no chance of winning. What do you say to that Craid?”

Craid gave a grin. He lift a single claw and taunted Gyrun. His famous taunt he gave before his battles began. Then he only uttered four words.

“I’ll take those odds!"


TO BE CONTINUED

[its_beca]

Well... I've read better. -_-

I could probably go through a pick out all the little things, but I just can't be bothered. *slaps her-stupid-lazy-self* <<;

So just off the top of my head:

1. Craid seems to switch between casual teen to cocky to this understanding good guy thing with years of wisdom behind him. o_o;; Nyeh, it's hard for me to describe. <_< But his personality doesn't seem constant.

2. Second chapter - the fight scence between Craid and the sea monster reminded me of a typical cartoon type fight. Slipping through tentacles and the likes. :\

3. Everything gets worked out too... "cleanly" if you can call it that. Problems and misunderstandings are fixed to easily. For example, when Craid suddenly understood why Aerin (I like her name by the way. :]) was so eager to get into bounty hunting and why did Surge still have the arrowhead stuck in his pants? o.O
The trying to get in via the pipeline was good though.

4. "and had blood red eyes as big as Surge’s paw. Definitely not demonic." Err... how do you define demonic? 0o

Ya, so.... just keep it up and write some more. I know I've focused on the not-so-great stuff in this post, soz, anyways your flow is good and Surge is a fun character. =D

Oh, and kudos for your spelling and grammer. I have to read through mine too many times before they're relatively mistake free.

[Ulti]

Writing comes with experience. So I love to hear what is wrong with my mistakes. This is just all coming from my head so everything is bleh

Craid is a tricky soul to figure out. I switch between his teen and old self because in a sense he is still a teen. But he was programed with all this info so he has a lot of wisdom. It just dioesnt come out when he wants it too<<

In my world, the moat beast wasn't demonic by aura and by sight. My demons will look partly human and won't be crossbreeds.

Now the beginning chapters arent supposed to be good. Craid is new to the world outside his island. He is uber strong and as time flows by he will realize how strong he is. I will make the problems get trickier. I just don't want you all to see Craid's talent upfront.

Surge will always be my favorite character to force him to get into trouble with. Oh how fun it shall be when I get my female character in>=)

Love your comments beca.You the best ^.^*huggles*And whoever still reads the fic please tell me what I have done wrong so I can fix it up in the next chapter.

[its_beca]

*huggles back* No problem, except Craid's "old" self would be the demon portion, right? And if he's programmed to hold heaps of information shouldn't it always be coming out?
Rather than switching between the three... err... different "parts" of him maybe he could be some confused mix of them? Or if you're looking to bring out these various sides to him make it really distinct.

I can only wish you luck in figuring him out. ^^"

[Ulti]

Ok. I make one thing clear. Craid wasn't originally a demon. He was created machine,demon,human..instant when he breathed life. To make it more simple, he was composed of the atoms that make up metal,dna of a human and dna of a demon. So he doesnt have that kind of old self. Now his old self, I was talking about his wisdom self. For now, Craid has two personalities because he has two different minds(demon and human). So he can be the cocky demon or the intelligent human. Thats why he switches a lot.

[Alaude Drenxta]

It seems like CRAID is just the sort of badass you have in almost every story, except for once difference, he doesnt seem to have that utter cockiness to him, which makes you enjoy reading about the character moreso.

Now Surge, he's a badass pimp boy, reminds me of mahself *happy tear* haha. It's really well done UK, gotta give you your props. I enjoy simply even reading the speech of the characters, which is abnormal for me because I'm a frantic for detail. I liked how fun and interesting you made the characters, the use of a comedy releif character always helps the reader ease themself into the story, without high tension that dsitracts them form the finer details and holds them to old thoughts. That way they can read now and reflect later.

The detail could have been expounded on a bit more intricatlely, and you could have possibly done more explaining on the physical features of the castle, or perhaps Gyrun himself, but other than that, nice ;)

8/10 now





NEXT CHAPTER :D

[Ulti]

This took too long to get back to writing. From now on my writing style will be changed. Now its like a book! Hopefully this will be better!

CHAPTER 6

The sun crept over the barren land ruled by Captain Gyrun. It crawled over the black castle like an insect. Craid covered his eyes as the light entered the hole in the eastern wall of the room. Gyrun’s body glistened with sweat and blood as the light filled the room.

“The sun..A wretched thing. It gives life and light, both of which I hate..”, growled Gyrun. “I prefer the moon. Dark, cold, and creates fear. Now lets not have dawn ruin out battle!” Gyrun clicked his fingers. Two Wicked Archers entered the room with drapes. They started to cover up the hole. Then they walked over to the only window and pulled on a brown rope. The curtains fell over the window, blocking the sunlight. The room once again became dark.

“Hehe. Did you forget that the sun gives the moon light? That is why the moon shines in the night sky. Without the sun, the moon wouldn’t be seen. Without light, darkness can’t exist. A regular fact of life,” chuckled Craid.

Gyrun frowned. Grinding his teeth, he then said “Cocky as ever. Now, that we have settled the bet, can we please get on with this?” Gyrun twirled his sword between his fingers. “My weapon of choice is my trusty blade. Don’t tell me you shall go by brute strength!”

Craid cracked his knuckles and then his neck. He thrusted his right arm forward, and then his left. “Why not? Its all I have after all”, said Craid. Gyrun grinned and pointed the tip of his blade at Craid. They both stared coldly at each other, neither one making a move.

Without warning, Craid charged toward Gyrun. Gyrun lifted his sword, ready to block the attack. Claws and swords locked with each other. Craid did all he could to push Gyrun backward, but he underestimated Gyrun’s strength. Gyrun slowly lifted one hand from the handle of his sword. Using the hand he grabbed onto one of Craid’s horns. Amazingly, he lifted Craid in the air. How could this be? He is twice as powerful as my scanners tell.

“Oh come on! The Craid I was told about wouldn’t be this weak. I guess I’ll just have to tear you limb from limb to find what I am looking for!” Gyrun started to spin around and around. Craid’s body followed Gyrun’s movements. Craid felt Gyrun’s cold hand leave his horn. His body was thrown across the room, smashing into a wall. Craid grunted as he got up. Little damage was done to his body but it still was painful. He looked up to find his enemy. Did he ever. Gyrun was right in his face for another attack. He landed a right upper cut then comboed with a fist to the gut. Craid once again smashed into the same wall. Craid gasped for air, clutching his stomach.

“You are very disappointing. You were created to bring pain, make others suffer, and create destruction upon the lands of this world. And yet you are as harmless as Zupo bird.” He swiftly kicked Craid in the face. Blood dripped from Craid’s nose. Some of it got onto Gyrun’s boots. “Now you got your dirty blood on my new boots. I’ll just have to make you suffer even more,” Gyrun said, picking Craid up by the collar. He looked him over, looking for something. “Hm, I wonder if it is true that your tail is made of the strongest metal ever created. A perfect sword could be created from your tail. I do hope you don’t mind me when I slice it off.”

Gyrun raised his sword to strike. As he brought it down, Craid raised both hands, stopping the blade. “If there is one thing I won’t stand for is losing my tail. You won’t be taking it!” Craid lifted his head back then smashed it into Gyrun’s skull. Gyrun fell backward to the blow, losing his grip on Craid. Craid took this chance to get as much distance between him and Gyrun. What was I thinking?! This man is too strong for me. He shouldn’t! When I first saw him, I was stronger. Now he is the strong one. There must be something giving him power.

Craid looked around the room. There was no sign of anything that could be of use. Maybe it is in another part of this castle. Something that could be sending waves might be possible. I can’t go and find out. Gyrun will be able to catch up to me…Of course! Craid once again searched the room. Lucky for him, when Craid head butted him he cracked his goggles. “Surge! Where are you pal? I need a little help,” yelled Craid. At first, only Craid could hear his own breathing.

“Aye, not so loud Craid! I was trying to rest up but now you need a helping hand. So much for all powerful..” Craid smiled and cupped his hands around his mouth. “I need you to find some kind of machine that is getting Gyrun his power! Check everywhere in the castle while I hold him off!”, Craid yelled. He took the sudden rush of footsteps a yes. Craid nodded and went off in search of Gyrun. “I may not have a nose like Surge’s or the ability to see in the dark, but I will not lose this battle. Now we will see who is disappointing!” With a bloodthirsty cry, Craid ran into the depths of the room, hopefully not to his doom…

Surge was on the move already. Searching from room to room, he sniffed out every object in his path. Yet, nothing he found was of any use. “This is getting annoying. How in the world am I supposed to find some kind of device that makes Gyrun stronger?” growled Surge. Picking up one of the many statues that scattered the castle, he tossed it into a wall. What he didn’t expect was for the statues to go through the wall. “What in the world…By my fluffy tail, it is a secret passage. Clever of Gyrun to put a cloaking device on it. Yet, he is stupid enough to have nothing protect it. Let us see what he is trying to hide here!” Taking a deep breath, Surge walked through the cloaked door.

The passage led to what looked like a miniature lab. All the technology amazed Surge. Buttons flashed and men in white coats ran through the lab. All but one noticed Surge. “H-hey! You sir! You are not authorized t-to be here!”, sputtered the man. Surge ignored the man and walked through the lab. The rather small man ran after Surge, trying to get his attention. “So human, what do these machines do?”. The stopped, catching his breath. He then said “None of your beeswax you..you demon! Captain Gyrun told me to never tell anyone of this machine!” Surge rolled his yes and dropped down to his knees to the man’s eye level. “So in other words, your machine is not doing what it is supposed to and you are a laughing stock” The man stomped his feet in anger. “No it is working perfectly! Right now Captain Gyrun is beating that beast into a pulp to our ma…” The man just realized he was tricked but he was too late. Surge was pressing every button in his reach. The rest of the men in the lab began to notice Surge. Setting aside their work, they rushed to pull the wolf demon off the machine. “Stop it! You are going to break it!” they said together. They tried pulling, pushing, and kicking Surge to stop it. But being a demon, Surge wouldn’t get off. “Oooooh! What have we here?”, Surge cooed. “It is a big red button. Something in me says to leave it be but my badass side says to push it. Thank the gods I only listen to the badass!” With a beep, all the lights in the lab turned off. Everyone became quiet, waiting for something.

The main screen turned on. The words “Warning! Self-Destruct Sequence Activated” flashed across the screen. “So you installed a self-destruct button. What kind of scientist puts a button that could destroy the building on a machine they worked years on?” The small man spoke again. “Union issues..You had to be there.” Surge nodded as the count down began. 30 seconds to escape from the room. Plus, he had to get all of the scientists out. “Now get out of here you humans. Scram!” It didn’t take long for the others to scramble out of the lab with wet pants. Surge was just passing through the cloaked passage when he heard the countdown reaching to 10. “Wait a minute..or at least 5 seconds. If the lab explodes, the force will escape from this opening and into the castle. Thus will the castle explode too. This is a bunch of bull! Craid so owes me for this!” Thinking quickly, Surge got all the statues and other objects in the room and stuffed them into the opening. With the speed only he could control, he ran two room lengths, just out of reach of the explosion. The force of the chaos rocked the entire castle…

The fight between Craid and Gyrun was still about. Craid had the slight advantage over Gyrun since Gyrun was blind as a bat in the dark. But Gyrun was still stronger. The battle seemed to be over. Craid was against the wall with Gyrun’s sword to his neck. “So..Craid. How does it feel? To wonder why you live. To want to know why you are different from everyone else. And yet, you can never know these answers. That is because you are too weak. A failure.” Craid choked on the blood that was flowing in his mouth. This can’t end like this. I can’t lose to a guy like this. I shall not…

The loudest bang that ever could be heard entered the room. It boomed across the walls, shattering the window in the room. Gyrun had to drop Craid to block the sound from his ears. Craid took this chance to scramble from the floor and back on his feet. “What are those idiots doing down there?!? When I get my hands on them I’ll…I’ll…” Gyrun stopped mid-sentence. He started to pat his clothing as if he was looking for something he lost. “What’s going on here?!! My strength..It’s fading!” Craid stared at Gyrun. It was like seeing a balloon deflate. Gyrun’s muscle grew smaller, but still noticeable. “So,” Craid sneered, “this is the true Gyrun. A pathetic weakling using technology to make you seem powerful. Now its my turn to show you MY power!” Gyrun was quickly on the defense. But without his fake muscles, Craid overpowered him. With a kick, a punch, and an another kick, Gyrun was defeated. Now it was Craid who was holding up Gyrun by the collar. “I’ll be taking my prize now. The knowledge of your mind. Tell me about my creators and their link to your kind!”, growled Craid. Gyrun closed his eyes, sighing. “Fine. I’ll let you on one thing that could help you. I am a man of my word. Your creators and the Dark Kingdom had a deal see? We gave them something and they gave us something..haha. Or should I say they would have gave us something. And the something is you. That is all I know.” Craid did not loosen his grip on Gyrun. “Are you sure that is all you know Gyrun..”, said Gyrun. Gyrun nodded and clenched his fist. “Yes! I told you! That is all I know you wretched beast! Now get your claws off me.” Craid gave a slight smile. He raised his hand in the air, gathering his claws in one position. “Wrong answer denum!” Craid smashed his clawed hand into Gyrun’s gut. Gyrun gasped as the cold hand of Death wisped his life away. His once clenched hand fell limp.

Surge ran in the room just in time to see the death of Gyrun. “Nice work there Craid. Did you really had to kill him? We are in enough trouble with the law as it is!” Craid let Gyrun’s body hit the floor as he walked over his demon friend. “He was lieing to me. Our deal was if I beat him he would tell me everything he knew about the connection between my creators and the Dark Kingdom. He kept a lot of secrets so I had to kill him. He didn’t deal me my full prize.” Surge titled his head in confusion. “How did he know he was lieing?” asked Surge. Craid pointed with his head at the body. “His body temperature grew, perspired a lot, and his tongue was purple. Kidding on the tongue thing though. So I guess you were the little the idiot who caused that loud bang.” Surge chuckled and patted Craid on the back. “Yup. Just call me a nuisance.”

As they walked out of the castle, Craid turned to Surge. “So why aren’t any Archers chasing after us to avenge their leader again?” Surge looked back on the castle. It was barren as the land itself. No Archers could be seen. “That is very odd. I wouldn’t know. But we shouldn’t let it bug us. We are heroes! We defeated a tyrant!” Craid smiled, throwing his hands behind his head. “One last question. Before I interrupted your battle, you said you had get yourself vengeance. Care to explain to me?” Surge stopped walking. The wind began to blow, ruffling his hair. “Long ago when I was only a pup, Gyrun was in my village. He was picking up fighters to be in his army. Lets just say he didn’t want volunteers. I never saw my father after he left.” Craid stopped walking too. His hair drooped a little as he walked back to Surge. “I am truly sorry for you. But you got your vengeance right?” Surge nodded. He said “Ya. Thanks to you…wait a minute! You heard me talk about my father? I said that before I was fighting Gyrun! I could have left here without this blood loss!” Craid laughed and ran ahead while Surge was chasing him down. One villain dead. But how many more will be in our hero’s path. Only fate shall know this answer and never reveal it till then.

[Cael]

good chapter UK ^^ the ONLY bad thing that u need to fix with your story is...............

GETTING IT OUT THERE :P Come on now UK. I'll help you ^^