| | #16 |
| Notorious White Mage Captainess Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: The Haunted Mansion Age: 20 Posts: 7,355
Rep Power: 10 ![]() ![]() Level: 35 EXP: | THanks! Anything in the story you liked, didn't like, or how I can improve? (And specifically) Check out HOly Knight. The Sequel/Prequel to this story! |
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| | #17 |
| Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: CA Posts: 139
Rep Power: 0 ![]() Level: EXP: | It seems a little long. I like Demy's back story but could you make it shorter. |
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| | #18 |
| Notorious White Mage Captainess Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: The Haunted Mansion Age: 20 Posts: 7,355
Rep Power: 10 ![]() ![]() Level: 35 EXP: | What woudl you have me cut? Just curious... I'm not changing it, but for future reference. |
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| | #19 |
| Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: CA Posts: 139
Rep Power: 0 ![]() Level: EXP: | Nothing, just bits that you chould save for later. |
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| | #20 |
| Notorious White Mage Captainess Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: The Haunted Mansion Age: 20 Posts: 7,355
Rep Power: 10 ![]() ![]() Level: 35 EXP: | It's a one shot, or was meant to be anyway. I didn't know I would do the sequel/prequel until later. |
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| | #21 |
| Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: CA Posts: 139
Rep Power: 0 ![]() Level: EXP: | Ah. Then carry on. Not much eles to say. |
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| Tags |
| demyx, kairi, paladin, thassalla |
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