Indelible Darkness: Part 1- Chains of Fate

[Chaos]

okay but its so good

[Max/souleater]

Now, my explaing of the org. plot and whatnot may not be the best, but I believe it will suffice for the stories sake. Not a bunch of action in this one, but hey, I'm still setting up story, sue meXD

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Chapter 3: An Early Truth, An Early Understanding, and the True Path to Destiny in Her Eyes

I was so confused... How does this man know me, what in the hell is happening?! Why was my head spinning uncontrollably like a merry-go-round whenever I tried to contemplate what was happening?...

“How... do you know me?” I asked the mysterious man... DIZ, as I held my head, feeling dizzy.

“I will explain everything,” he told me, “Come with me, and your path will be laid out for you, only with truth awaiting you at the end.”

“Ok...” I didn’t know who he was, but I didn’t care. I can’t explain it, but I felt like I was just supposed to do this, so I followed him through the strange new town, without speaking a word the whole time. This place was very different from my island. It was definitely bigger, there were more people, and street lights, everywhere. There was a bizarre hole in a city wall I followed him through, and we were in a forest. I didn’t understand why it was there, I just suppose there was some accident and it hadn’t been fixed or something. Before I knew it, we stopped walking, and when I looked up, there was a big, black iron gate between two brick walls, and it looked as if it led to a massive old mansion.

“We are here,” DIZ told me as he motioned me to come forward, “I want to see something, could you take out your keyblade?”

“Uh, yeah, sure.” I took it out, and it started glowing at the end, and a light shot out of it into the giant keyhole on the gate.

“Impressive, so you are the real thing,” He said. He began walking in, and I slowly followed.

This place was a giant mess. A destroyed chandelier in the middle of the room, broken picture frames, and shattered pieces of glass all over the floor.

“This way Riku,” He directed me toward a door on the far left of the first floor, and we both walked almost side-by-side to the room. As soon as we entered, we both took a seat in two old chairs.

“Now, Riku, Prepare yourself, because I’m about to explain a lot at once.”

“I sure hope so,” I told him.

“Now, these creatures you fought, they are called “Heartless,” dark beings who have lost their hearts. They try to steal peoples’ hearts, and they will probably be more drawn to you, than anyone, due to you being the wielder of the keyblade. Now lately, the stars in the sky have been going out. These stars were, as you may have guessed, other world being swallowed by the darkness, like your island. The heartless reside in the darkness, which is why you fought them on the island when it was consumed. Next off, there is a group of people trying to wield the heartless. There are six of them, Maleficent being the leader, then Jafar, Ursula, Hook, Oogie, and Hades. They want to use the heartless to their advantage, and find the seven princesses of heart to open up Kingdom Hearts, where they believe the core of all darkness is, the creation place of all hearts and an ultimate dark power they wish to wield. You probably didn’t know, but your friend Kairi, is one of these princesses, which means this group will be after her in no time, if they don’t have her already.”

“What?! They want Kairi?!” I didn’t care about any more of this stuff, if she was in danger, I had to save her!

“Riku, listen, I can help you, but there is much more you need to know,” he said. I contained myself, and listened. “Now Riku, we aren’t at the worst of it. There is another group. They call themselves the Organization, and they are growing. They are using beings known as “Nobodies,” which are created when a person loses their heart, at the same time the heartless comes into play. The Organization members are nobodies that look just like you and me, for when someone with a strong heart becomes a heartless, a nobody is born that looks very, very similar to their original self, and they all seem to fall under one Nobodies wing, the head honcho, Xemnas. They also want Kingdom Hearts, but they want it so they can become whole, get their own heart, and they are getting to it by collecting hearts to make their own Kingdom Hearts, and everytime a heartless is killed, a heart is released into this creation. Xemnas is the Nobody of... A man named Xehanhort, and Xehanhorts heartless is calling himself “Ansem”, who also wants this Kingdom Hearts, and he wields a powerful darkness. All of these forces are out there Riku, and as Keybearer, its your job to stop them.”

I was dumbfounded. “WHAT IS ALL THIS BULLSHIT?!” is what I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs. I didn’t fully understand, I guessed it was something I’d have to grasp as I went along.

“Now there’s more, and all of it’s truth, is written within these reports. Read over them, perhaps a page a night, and maybe it will help you understand more.”

He handed me a report, and I flipped through the pages as he continued speaking.

“The members of the Organization wear cloaks, to hide themselves,” he held up what seemed to be a black trench coat, and handed it to me, “Before you leave, put this on. They may seek you out for your power, and that would not be good if they found you. Now, about your darkness...”

“Yeah... I can feel when it wants to pull me in,” I told him as I grasped my chest. “It’s really, really cold, it feels like frostbit on my chest, and it feels like I’m about to implode into nothing... It hurts, but don’t get me wrong, it almost feels... inviting, like its right for me to reside within it, but I don’t want to.”

“Riku, your darkness is yours. It may not necessarily be the worst of things to open up to it a little, because your darkness is just as much you as your light. But if you do let it in, do not forget about your light and completely remain in the dark. Do you understand?”

“Yeah, but I have one more question. How do you know who I am.”

“Ah, well, I’ve been watching over you and your friends, for you are all linked to this situation, but your heart was the strongest of them all, which is why you wield the keyblade. For a while I began to think your heart was wavering though, and the master would be Sora. But you came back to yourself and here we are. To think the simplest little things could change your destiny.”

“So, what now?” I asked. I really had no idea what I should do.

“Well, Riku, I will prepare a ship for you. You can take it where you need, but first, take the train from town to Yen Sid’s Tower. Here, you will take your first big step towards truth.

~~~

I didn’t speak to DIZ again after that. I immediately headed toward the station, making many stops to ask for directions. The townspeople seemed nice, but I really paid no attention. I was reading the report as I walked. When I got to the station square, there were a bunch of white creatures surrounding a person. These, were the nobodies I was guessing. I took out my keyblade, and rushed in to help! They weren’t that tough, but there were a lot of them... I took priority in getting the person out, and when I got to them, there were heartless all over them too. I could see the person now, and they were struggling to get away. I attacked and defeated a few of the heartless in a couple easy swings, and watched as hearts released into the sky.

“Just like DIZ said...” I saw the person was a girl now, and I grabbed her wrist, and pulled her to her feet as I hurriedly scrambled to get her away from the enemies. I managed to get her to the station steps, she seemed like she was okay, she had some scratches and she was panting, but other than that, I think I made it on time. She sat down on the steps, and looked up at me with these big, ocean- blue eyes, that looked like two small puddles waiting for me to jump into them.
I turned real fast and attacked two nobodies rapidly heading our way, and then I rushed a small group of heartless to our left, and took them all out in one vertical swing. I looked around, and it seemed the rest retreated.

I approached the girl on the steps, and looked her over. She had Blonde hair, a little longer than Kairi’s, yet shorter than mine, and it had this golden shine where the sunset was beating off of it. She was wearing a tight black tank top, and a blue skirt, with light soft looking legs going down to her black shoes. There was one cut on her face from a heartless’ claw, and some scratches on her arms.

I touched her shoulder, and asked her, “Are you okay, your not hurt are you?”

She looked at me with those eyes again, and just smiled.

“Um...”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” she said a few seconds later. “Haha, sorry for that late reply, I just kinda thought it was funny, because you're blushing.”

“Huh?! I uh...” I was so embarrassed... I felt very strange, and I didn’t know why, but I couldn’t look away from her. “Um, I’m glad you’re okay. My name’s Riku... What’s yours?

“Hee-hee, I’m Lerane, nice to meet you Riku.”

To be continued...

~You are free to break the chains of fate that bind you~

[Beastly]

i read the first chapter, nice job. when i get some time, i'll read the other 2 chapters.

[Chaos]

that amazing chapter i see a love circle between riku and lerane great job max keep up the good work buddy

[Lectori Salutem]

A lot of explaining in this chapter. Well, it has to happen too sometimes. It's interesting, and that's good enough for an explaining chapter like this. So good job! I'm looking forward to the next chapter!

[Shinkirō]

You're doing a brilliant job of this bro, keep it up. I loved the latest chapter too

[Silent Avera]

^0^ Keep it up Max! I like seeing Riku as the hero, but then, Sora....... ;0;

[Chaos]

poor sora buts its riku time to shine

[Nevermore]

It's not bad. It's always interesting to here an alternate telling of a story that people know so well. However, as someone else mentioned, the story does feel choppy.

It feels halting, staggered, and doesn't flow at all. From what I can tell, that's mostly do to how you structure your sentences. You place a lot of unneeded commas, breaking up the sentence. It forces the reader to pause every time they see one. If you use too many, it can get annoying. Your descriptions are good (though they could always improve). Right now, just work on varying your sentences (long, short, compound, etc.).

All and all, it's interesting and has a lot of potential. Keep up the hard work!

[roxasisamazing]

I like it bro nicely done Max

[Max/souleater]

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate you reading^^ I'll try to get chapter 4 done as soon as I get back (I'll be gone for two weeks at my aunts, and she doesnt have internet, I leave Sunday)

And thanks Raven, I'll try to pay attention when I'm writing as to where I put in unneeded commas, and I will continue to work on description.

Thanks again everybody^^

[Max/souleater]

(well, I was afraid of this. No one else posted after my last post, so i am forced to double post to bump this up with new chapter. and for those of you who read my last post, im not going away for two weeks now.)

Anyway, heres chapter 4. I must apologize, this chapter is prbably going to be kind of boring. I tried to put it together real nice, and keep some deeper story running, its just there is no action. I couldnt fit any in this chapter, but be expecting nothing but action once we hit chapter 5XD

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Chapter 4: Struck by Lightning

“Nice to meet you too...” I was speechless. This girl was beautiful, and I felt dumb just standing there staring at her. I felt... jittery. Worst of all I had more important things that needed taken care of.

“Um, Riku?”

“Wh-what is it Lerane?”

“There something on my face?”

“No, no, no! It’s just... There’s a cut on your face.” Nice save.

She put her hand to her cheek and just laughed, “Oh, it doesn’t hurt that bad, you got to me before the heartless did any real damage, and the nobodies didn’t even get to me.”

“You know about the heartless and the nobodies?”

“Well yeah, I learned all about them from master Yen Sid.”

“Master Yen Sid? That’s where I was headed when I found you.”

“What a coincidence, that’s where I was headed before I was attacked, we should go together,” she said to me as she smiled and grabbed my hand.

“Yeah, that sounds great.”

She pulled me along, and we passed the ticket booth, and got on a strange purple train.

“We didn’t pay,” I told her as we sat down.

“We don’t have to to head to Yen Sid’s tower. Don’t ask me why, but they never make us.”

I found it strange that there was no train fare, but I wasn’t going to complain. I wondered why DIZ wanted me to visit Yen Sid. What exactly was Yen Sid going to tell me? How would this help? Did he maybe know where Sora and Kairi were? Or maybe he knew more about my darkness.

“Riku, we’re here,” Lerane told me as the train stopped.

We got off, and before us stood a humongous tower. There were many bushes lined up along the pathway leading to the entrance of the tower.

“There are a bunch of steps, but bear with me ok,” Lerane said as she grabbed my hand once more, and we began our ascent.

There were many, many stairs, and every so often we’d come to a room. The rooms were lit up with a bunch of bizarre lights, and we would just walk straight through them and continue up more stairs.

“So Riku, why do you need to see Master Yen Sid?” Lerane asked me.

“Well, how many more stairs are there?”

“Haha, a bunch.”

I told her everything. I totally opened up, and told her all about my dreams, the darkness, the keyblade, Sora, Kairi... And not once did she say anything. She watched me, and listened intently as I spoke. She actually tripped once because she wasn’t paying attention to where she was walking, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“So, this DIZ man thinks Master Yen Sid can help you find your friends?”

“Well, I’m not sure what Yen Sid will do,” I told her, “But I need to find out whatever I can.”

“Oh, we made it to the top, come on, lets go,” Lerane said in a happy toned voice as we entered.

Once inside the top floor room, there was a man looking out his window, speaking to a very short person with round ears.

“Lerane, you made it back?” The man said. As he turned around, I saw he had a very long white beard, and he wore a blue robe, with a tall and pointy blue hat.

“Yes, why master?” Lerane asked the man I now presumed to be Yen Sid. “You sound surprised.”

Yen Sid had a very serious look on his face as he approached Lerane and said, “Some time after you left, I had a very bad feeling. I told you when I read the stars I felt you should remain indoors today, yet you left your house to come here, and you left again to return to town! So just as you left my tower, I felt harm may come your way, and even if I chased after you, it may be too late... I also saw you forgot your daggers here, and I know you have trouble wielding your magic without them. I just had a feeling your fate was sealed in Twilight Town...”

“I’m sorry Master,” Lerane said as a sincere apology, “But I really wanted to see the struggle today... I was too late anyway, it was over by the time I got there, and I felt horrible for not listening to you, so I was hurrying back, and I was attacked. But Riku saved me, so it was all okay.”

“Riku?” Yen Sid asked as he turned his head and looked at me, “But you’re supposed to- No. Never mind. Apparently, the all knowing Yen Sid needs to stop trusting silly things such as stars, and watch thing with his own eyes.”

“So you’re Yen Sid?” I asked him, even though I really already knew, “DIZ sent me to talk to you.”

Yen Sid placed his hand on my forehead, and closed his eyes.

“What’re you-“

“Quiet Riku,” Lerane whispered to me, “He’s concentrating.”

“So that’s what you chose is it?” Yen Sid quietly muttered, “Well then, I suppose I know the next course of action.”

“What?” I asked him. I had no idea what he was talking about.

“Master Yen Sid read your life’s journey up to now through your memories,” the person with round ears said as he walked over, “My name is Mickey, Mickey Mouse, nice to meet you Riku.”

“You too Mickey,” I reached my hand out and shook his hand.”

“Mickey, this is the one you seek,” Yen Sid said to Mickey.

“Really?” Mickey redirected his stare to me, “Do you wield the keyblade Riku?”

“Yes I do,” I told Mickey.

“Well then, that was easier than I thought.”

Yen Sid looked over at me as he went over to his desk and sat down. “Okay then, Mickey, escort Riku and Lerane to the ship DIZ was asking me to hold. It was meant for you and this boy anyway I do believe. There, you all may decide your courses of action, whether they be together, or separate.

“Okay,” Mickey said as he began walking toward a window, “Follow me you two.” I looked out the window he was approaching, and I could see some sort of ship floating out there.

“Wait a second, what was it that DIZ said you would tell me?” I asked Yen Sid.

“Well, if I recall, DIZ told you this would be your first step towards truth. Nothing should be expected of me, although I will tell you that to find what you seek, you should go with King Mickey.”

“I guess you’re right. Well this is all I have going for me right now, so I will go with King- Did you say ‘King’ Mickey?!”

“Haha, yup, I’m a King alright. King of Disney Castle,” Mickey told me, “But lets not talk about that around anyone else, all right. I’m trying to keep a low cover.”

“Master, did you say I was to go with them?” Lerane asked Yen Sid.

“Yes, you will go with Riku and help him on his journey,” Yen Sid said to Lerane. “I have no more to teach you, and I can feel your heart. It wants to go with the person that saved your life, so you can protect them.”

“Okay, Master. Then I’m going with Riku,” Lerane said as she picked up some daggers laying on Yen Sid’s desk. “Don’t worry Riku, I won’t be a burden, as long as I have my daggers, I’m an excellent fighter, and I am great at magic!”

“Alright then, I’ll be glad to have you along,” I told her. I really was happy I didn’t have to part ways with her so soon. I felt a warmth in my heart... Was this my light? But my light had never felt like this before, the few times it seemed to show up. Was this her light?

“I mostly favor thunder attribute magic, so watch out!” she seemed to jokingly say to me.

“Well you two, lets hurry up and get out of here,” Mickey said, and Lerane and I followed him into the ship.

~~~

He was flying the ship. We were in space, and it was fantastic! The stars never seemed to shine so bright, and when I looked over at Lerane, she was smiling as she watched the stars pass us by too. As we watched the stars, I told my story yet again, this time for Mickey to hear.

After I told my story, Mickey glanced back at us. “Here Lerane, change into this robe,” Mickey said as he passed her back a black robe.

“It looks just like Riku’s,” she said as she went into a room further back in the ship to change. She got back in no time at all, and took her seat again.

“Yes, I’m going to wear one too. I didn’t think I would need one, at least not yet, but since Riku had his, I figured you and I should take the precaution now too, so I got more from DIZ. If anything happens to the ones we have now, we do have spares,” Mickey said to Lerane.

“So where are we going?” I asked Mickey. I was curious, nothing was said to either of us about where we were headed.

“Well, with the stars going out, or worlds being destroyed if you will, there are many things that need done. One of which is the keyholes to many worlds will need sealed. This can only be done with a keyblade. Once someone does this, the heartless are prevented from overthrowing that world in masses, the world is pretty much saved. When I talked to Yen Sid, he told me someone else with a key was already doing this. Lerane, you already know about all of this, for I’m sure Yen Sid explained it all.” Mickey said.

“Someone else has a keyblade?” I asked Mickey.

“Yes, according to Yen Sid,” Mickey said, “I sent my two most trusted companions to search for them, and Yen Sid said they are together, which is why I was surprised to find you. Then, I, also have a keyblade. So, I asked Yen Sid and he said the other wielder is sealing keyholes. I plan on searching for Kingdom Hearts and the Organization. As for you, the first step in the plan was to take you to Hollow Bastion, where I hope you and Lerane can take down the group gathering the Princesses of heart. If you did this, one of our major problems would be out of the way, and your friend Kairi would be safe. You may also be able to find out where she is there.”

“Then please, take us there!” I exclaimed. I was anxious, if I could find out where Kairi was there, perhaps Sora would be there too, “Together, Lerane and I can take these guys out, I know it!”

“Okay then,” Mickey said,” I’ll take you two to Hollow Bastion then.”

Lerane smiled, and looked over at me. “Leave it to us your majesty, me and Riku will take them out in no time at all.”

To be continued...

~You are free to break the chains of fate that bind you~

[Chaos]

awesome chapter its exciting and you said it was boring its really good

[NaminesNobody]

This is really good! Andokay I jsut notieced this but Lerane+X=Larxene... coincidence?

[Max/souleater]

thanks WtT^^

Originally Posted by NaminesNobody

This is really good! Andokay I jsut notieced this but Lerane+X=Larxene... coincidence?

hmm, lol, its a mysteryXD