Here Comes the Bride - Page 12

Andillexe · March 14th, 2009, 10:00 PM

But I don't know if I'm going to post it right after I write it, or wait until the whole thing's finished then post chapter by chapter like the previous two. Probably either way you're looking at it coming out around summer. School and homework's been screwing me up.

Jeez, that's a lot of stuff to write. Sucks about your cowriter. I would never be able to write with someone else, but that's just me.

madammina · March 14th, 2009, 10:02 PM

It worked for WotU, but it didn't work for that which is too bad. She had some ideas.

madammina · April 5th, 2009, 02:45 AM

This isn't a new post, sorry guys, but a friend did some HCTB fan art I'm sharing

http://pseudocide335.deviantart.com/...uest-118138289

Once I finish this next chapter of Timefixer and (finally) get the next Larxene and 14 done, expect Night 2.

If you like the art, fav it please!

Andillexe · April 6th, 2009, 11:45 PM

Can I ask a random question? Why is the title "Here Comes the Bride"? Just curious.

Also, nice picture. =)

madammina · April 6th, 2009, 11:51 PM

OH! Well, That is my favorite of Constance's lines. I would put in a clip, but it's a spoiler.

And I like the picture too. It's currently my background. Oona and Riku are really good in it. Leta's a little too blue for my taste, but still very good.

Organization_42 · April 7th, 2009, 04:06 AM

Hey, I just got around to reading Day 2! Sorry I took so long!!! I think it's your best yet! I really liked the Madame Leota/Riku/Oona plotline, though I can't help but think that Oona changed Riku's drink on purpose so that they could talk about him without him knowing.

And poor Kairi! Constance really gave her a workout!

madammina · April 7th, 2009, 04:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Organization_42

Hey, I just got around to reading Day 2! Sorry I took so long!!! I think it's your best yet! I really liked the Madame Leota/Riku/Oona plotline, though I can't help but think that Oona changed Riku's drink on purpose so that they could talk about him without him knowing.

Yes.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Organization_42

And poor Kairi! Constance really gave her a workout!

hehehe... wait until you see Kairi later

Organization_42 · April 7th, 2009, 05:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by madammina

Yes.

*pumps fist* I knew it!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by madammina

hehehe... wait until you see Kairi later

Poor, poor Kairi! It's not right to try and force her to be a proper Victorian lady! Just more proof of Constance's cruelty, I guess!

madammina · April 7th, 2009, 05:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Organization_42

*pumps fist* I knew it!!

she dumps about half a bottle of whiskey into his tea. I don't envy his hangover.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Organization_42

Poor, poor Kairi! It's not right to try and force her to be a proper Victorian lady! Just more proof of Constance's cruelty, I guess!

Oh, wait till you see...

Andillexe · April 7th, 2009, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by madammina

OH! Well, That is my favorite of Constance's lines. I would put in a clip, but it's a spoiler.

Aww... Guess I'll just have to wait then. Maybe. >:3

Quote:

she dumps about half a bottle of whiskey into his tea. I don't envy his hangover.

I didn't realize that it was that much. o.o He must've had one hell of a hangover then.

Reflection · April 8th, 2009, 02:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by madammina

Oh, wait till you see...

0_0;

*ominous foreboding feeling*

madammina · May 5th, 2009, 05:54 AM

One last chapter before I leave! All future updates until I get back will be on DA.

NOTE!A character uses some racist language. If this offends you, don't read. This was meant to show a state of mind and this wouldn't be remarked on during the period.

Night 2
Riku staggered into the hall, he was trying not to throw up. The place was bright… the noises were loud… He covered his ears as Leota told a very confused Rolly that Riku was sick, was going to sleep it off, and she was going to stay with him to make sure he was okay. He managed to get to his room somehow, threw up in the trash bucket, and barely made it to his bed before collapsing..
________________________________________
Constance watched the proceedings on the main floor. Riku was wasted, and Madam Leota looked confident. Where had they been? Why was she so confident? Why… her thoughts trailed off as Leota helped Riku away. Constance walked down the stairs and stopped before Rolly. He tried to scurry away, but she called out.

“Rolly” he stopped and turned. He looked down towards the ground while anunciating

“Yes, Ma’am” Still subservient, thank goodness. Some Darkies had some uppity ideas. At least Rolly didn’t…

“What is going on?” Rolly scuffed at the floors before answering.

“According to Ma’am Leota, Riku got drunk. She don’ think he coul’ die, but she wants to make sure.”

“Thank you, you may go now.” Rolly fled. So… this was interesting. How did Riku get drunk? She wandered off towards the library. She picked up a book then and didn’t read it. She needed to look over her plans. Sora… had that puppy dog crush on her still. She needed to draw him in a bit more. Kairi was falling into the way of a perfect little lady. She admired Constance. A little more and she wouldn’t listen to people who smeared her reputation. Riku… Riku was easily insane. He went out, and came back incredibly drunk, and his friend was a gypsy seer… anything he said would be ignored easily. Now, how should she get closer to Sora? That key….
___________________________________________-

“Miss Kairi?” Harriet leaned over Kairi’s shoulder. “You’re making an AWFUL mess of that stitching.” Kairi grinned and waved around her needle a bit.

“I know Harriet… I’m just having some trouble sewing… I, er, don’t know how.” Kairi blushed. It had never been an issue on the island. She usually just bought her clothes. Harriet clucked and sat down next to Kairi before gently removing the primer and taking it in her worn hands. They were outside, it wasn’t raining and both of them wanted to take advantage of the weather. Plus, Kairi was bored.

There was a flutter of cloth, then a click clack as Constance walked onto the stone porch. Her brown hair was still back in a bun, but she had tried her heavy black dress for one of a lighter fabric.

“Kairi, have you seen Sora?” she inquired. Kairi looked up, and accidentally pricked her finger.

“I think he went to the living room.” Kairi said distractedly, watching Harriet work on the primer after taking it away for fear of blood stains. As Harriet tried to teach her how to sew, Kairi started to wonder. Why was Constance so interested in Sora. He could be good looking (after being with him as long as she could remember, the idea of any of them being handsome had worn away long ago) but it was a little odd how interested Constance was. Then with Riku, er, he might have had some bad ideas before (the raft was one of the first to come to mind, though it was not the worst by far) he had never acted like this before.

“Miss Kairi” Kairi jumped as Harriet called her attention again. “Please focus, you need to impress people with how well you sew!”

“It’s stupid, Harriet, why would people be impressed with how well I sew?” She grumbled. Harriet chuckled, and gave a slight nod of the head.

“Indeed it is, considering how most people in your position hire seamstresses, but do you have much else to do with your time?” Kairi gave an impulsive hug to the suddenly shocked Harriet, then took the primer out of her hands and began to learn how to sew.
________________________________
Sora WAS in the living room. He lay on the large maroon velvet couch with “the Count of Monte Cristo” spread in front of him. He looked utterly undignified, but he had been drawn into the story about betrayal and love.

“Sora.” With a start, he looked up at Constance standing above him. The setting sun cast warm colors over her, though the effect was kind of ruined by her black dress. She really was sweet. And Pretty… “Sora…”

“Yes, Miss Hatchaway?” Sora responded, not really paying attention.

“Call me Constance, and can I sit with you for a bit? It will be dinner time soon.”

“Uh, sure…Constance.” He called people by their first names all the time! Why was it so embarrassing to do the same with Constance? She sat next to him slowly, making sure she didn’t reveal any thing. Girls could be weird like that.

“Can… can you read to me while dinner is being prepared?” She asked. Sora gave another love struck smile and started to read out loud.

“Chapter 4 - Conspiracy

Danglars followed Edmond and Mercedes with his eyes until the two lovers disappeared behind one of the angles of Fort Saint Nicolas, then turning round, he perceived Fernand, who had fallen, pale and trembling, into his chair, while Caderousse stammered out the words of a drinking-song.

‘Well, my dear sir,’ said Danglars to Fernand, ‘here is a marriage which does not appear to make everybody happy.’”

As Sora read, he tried to rationalize. That’s what Riku would do, right? But… he made some bad decisions when he rationalized. And now he hadn’t seen his friend since breakfast. Plus he had been acting really weird… But still Sora tried to run over his points with Constance. She seemed smart at least, she was kind, caring, pretty, took an obvious interest in Sora… bad sides, there had to be some bad sides… but Sora couldn’t think of any. She listened with obvious attentiveness as the sky turned from a dusky blue to a deep orange red.
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He was an idiot… Constance was sure of that. She was also going to make sure to have some strong wine at dinner. She needed to be a bit drunk to deal with him. Sora wasn’t simple, per se, but him being love struck did dumb down his intelligence. Of Course, that happened to every man. It was a little awkward, him being so young, but it was working…

“M’Lady?” it was Westley. “ Dinner is ready.” Sora stopped reading a put the book down sheepishly. With a smile, Constance grabbed his hand and, blushing, asked.

“Would you like to go to dinner with me?”
______________________________
“Would you like to go to dinner with me?” Sora felt a blush spread across his cheek as he squeezed her hand.

“Of course.” He said. And he followed her in a daze.
__________________
“Ma’am Leota?” Rolly peaked his head into Riku’s room. Riku was asleep under the sheets while Leota gazed into her crystal ball to pass the time. “Dinner is ready.”

“No thank you, Master Rolly.” Leota replied. Whatever she saw had her enthralled. She waited for Rolly to leave before casting her spell. There was something here, and she needed to talk to whoever could know the most… like Constance’s husband. The way Ambrose had felt… it was suspicious. And, the possession had left a violent aftertaste. Combine that with the perdiction of Riku’s death…. She glanced over at him. He continued to sleep soundly, at least he could have some rest. And considering how far out he was…

“Serpents and Spiders…” She couldn’t finish. The spirit took her over immediately.
________________________
Kairi was nursing several pricked fingers as she ate her soup. She had started to get sewing finally… the basic stitches. She was so bad at this! She wanted Constance to be proud of her, she had taken them in after all, and she needed to learn how to sew!

CRASH With a tinkling of porcelain, the various dishes shuddered as the door to the dining room swung open. Leota stood there, her arms and legs spread as she held the door open.

“CONSTANCE!” a voice came from her throat… it was her voice, but so much deeper. It also had a slight accent… “What are you doing? The last thing I remember is getting in that train, and I am NOT in a train now, you curmudgeon.” Kairi’s face slipped into one of shock, followed quickly by everyone else there. Well, everyone but Constance. She was struggling to hold on to her composure. “We are NOT in New York like you planned.” Leota strode across the floor, several of the servants backing up out of fear. “So, where are we… and what happened.” Leota’s eyes narrowed as she arrived in front of Constance.

“Fr…Frank?” Constance asked, she had lost her composure. Constance stood up, and placed a hand on Leota’s shoulder. Then Leota’s knees went weak, and she collapsed.
______________
Frank, she had channeled Frank… Constance caught Leota as she fell. For the first time, Constance noticed a tattoo on Leota’s left arm, something like the face of a fox with a lot of tails. What was going on? That was the second of her husbands to be channeled… Why? What did Leota know? Wesley and Mary helped remove Leota so she could be placed in her room.

“Where’s Riku?” Sora asked, as he watched Leota being carried away. “Shouldn’t he help Madam Leota too?”

“Riku is ill, he succumbed to the dangers of drink and collapsed.” Constance said stiffly. She needed a drink herself after this. “Now if you excuse me, I have to go… this has rather disturbed me.”
____________________
Sora and Kairi both walked to their rooms… they didn’t say anything. This was getting a bit odd. Kairi checked her reflection before turning to Sora.

“Should we leave?” she asked. “I mean… it seems like everything started when we arrived here.”

“When Leota did.” Sora corrected her, “Constance was fine with us..”

“You mean fine with you. I’ve seen how you look at her.” Kairi teased. She watched Sora blush. “But remember, Riku saw the headless painting before Leota arrived.” Sora evaluated her words. And Kairi… She wasn’t sure what to say. This whole thing was getting weird.

“Let’s stay.” Sora finally decided. “If it’s something with Riku, it would happen anywhere. Here’s just as good.”
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BANG Rolly started as he finished putting away the dishes. He peaked out to see a very disheveled and angry Riku going through the corridors.

“Master Riku?” Rolly called out. “Are you awlrigh’?”

“NO!” He was mad. “I was sleeping, when these drunks in the graveyard decided to SING! They’re fantastic, and on key, but that’s beside the point. They wouldn’t be singing in the graveyard if they were sober.” The sink looked out on the graveyard in the kitchen, and no one had mentioned singing… but considering how deranged Riku looked, Rolly figured it was a good idea not to mention that.

“Where are you going?” He finally asked. Riku shot him a look.

“To the graveyard! I want to yell at them and go to bed.” And off Riku went, his robe around his shoulders. Rolly decided to follow. If anything happened, he could help.

Riku wound his way to the area of the graveyard where they had tombstones instead of memorials. Ticked off, mud covering their shoes, Riku glared at four busts who mutely stared off into the distance.

“Despite the fact you four shouldn’t be able to sing, can you please shut up.” Shut up? NO ONE said Shut up… it was too rude. “I can’t sleep, and I have a headache. You are marvelously in tune, but I can’t fall asleep. So, would you kindly stop singing.” He paused, Rolly watched the scene with incredulity. “Would you at least keep it down. Most of the time I would LOVE to hear you, but it’s just that one song, and it’s night time.” Another pause. “Thank you.” And with that, Riku walked back to the Mansion, humming a song, and Rolly just stared after him.

Hehehe....You know the drill! what you liked, what you didn't, and how I can improve/what could happen.

Organization_42 · May 5th, 2009, 06:54 AM

Very engaging! This was a great chapter, and I was laughing at the end with Riku and the busts, especially when he would stop to mention that they were "marvelously in tune". The part with Leota channeling Frank was delightfully creepy, and I liked being able to read the story from Sora and Kairi's points of view. They're obviously wrong, but it's more understandable when one can see why they think the way they do.

My only (minor) criticism, would be this part:

Quote:

“Would you like to go to dinner with me?”
______________________________
“Would you like to go to dinner with me?” Sora felt a blush spread across his cheek as he squeezed her hand.

“Of course.” He said. And he followed her in a daze.

I know you're switching points of view, but it would probably help the flow of the story if you didn't repeat the question. But again, it's just a minor thing. Overall, nice work!

madammina · May 5th, 2009, 07:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Organization_42

Very engaging! This was a great chapter, and I was laughing at the end with Riku and the busts, especially when he would stop to mention that they were "marvelously in tune".

Well, they are... I kind of wanted to show what Riku sees from another perspective.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Organization_42

The part with Leota channeling Frank was delightfully creepy, and I liked being able to read the story from Sora and Kairi's points of view. They're obviously wrong, but it's more understandable when one can see why they think the way they do.

Yeah, it was too much from Riku's. And so I knocked him out for this chapter. And it was fun writing for Frank possessed Leota. And now you see what everything is thinking!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Organization_42

My only (minor) criticism, would be this part:

I know you're switching points of view, but it would probably help the flow of the story if you didn't repeat the question. But again, it's just a minor thing. Overall, nice work!

Okay, I was trying to show the same period. I'll keep it in mind.

Okay, what do you think will happen?

Organization_42 · May 5th, 2009, 07:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by madammina

Well, they are... I kind of wanted to show what Riku sees from another perspective.

Yeah, it was too much from Riku's. And so I knocked him out for this chapter. And it was fun writing for Frank possessed Leota. And now you see what everything is thinking!

Yeah, I didn't notice that about Riku until I started reading this chapter, and that made it all the stronger. Not that I don't love Riku, he's a great character!

Quote:

Originally Posted by madammina

Okay, what do you think will happen?

I think Kairi will start to get suspicious and start listening to Riku, while Sora will continue to let Constance wrap him around her little finger until its too late. And Constance will try to get rid of Leota.