Critique Request Thread [Currently hiring!]

[kairi_angel]

Basically, if you have a story, a fanfiction, a poem, a song, it doesn't matter...
If you write and request one of us here to look over it, we will try to give you a full length critique.

BUT WAIT!
There are rules:

Thank you for understanding.

WE'RE HIRING!! <3

Please speak up if you'd like to give critiques with us, too! Contact Annoyance if you'd like info on anything critic related after reading this:

--Request format--
Title:
Link:
Preferred critic [optional]: (Please state and send them a VM on their page.)
Other comments: (Is it a poem, fanfic, a normal short story? Various other requests?)
(Want us to wear a party hat while doing it? Sure.)
(Other details go here, blah blah blah.)

CURRENT MEMBERS BEING READ:
(Listed by order of request)

[FANFIC]"I Want To Linger" by Passion
(CaptainKchuckles)
[FANFIC]"Renegades of Funk" by Lanydx reborn
(Mistaerea) (Passion)
[FANFIC]"Fanfic of Total Randomness" by Lanydx reborn and Kingdom Key
(Passion)
[NOVEL]"Glass: The Invisible Mirror" by Taokitty
[UP FOR GRABS]
[FANFIC]"The ORG Intermission" by Izayoi
(Sabrina)
[LIGHT NOVEL] "banzai!" by Nyangoro
(Sabrina)
[SHORT STORY] "Linger ~The Light Above the Spring" by Nyangoro
[UP FOR GRABS]
[FANFIC] "Obliviónis Tredecim" by spirit-of-light
[UP FOR GRABS]
[FANFIC] "358/2 Days: Kairi's Story" by Jason1
[UP FOR GRABS]
"The Hearts of Azeroth" by Animus Origo
[UP FOR GRABS]

[kazukifafner]

For those who are curious, "immature and every other word like it" includes the following: adolescent, baby, babyish, callow, childish, crude, green, half-grown, imperfect, infantile, infantine, jejune, juvenile, kid, kidstuff, premature, puerile, raw, sophomoric, tender, tenderfoot, underdeveloped, undergrown, undeveloped, unfinished, unfledged, unformed, unripe, unseasonable, unseasoned, unsophisticated, untimely, wet behind ears, youthful

In other words: No bitchin'

[kairi_angel]

eh I'm just going to say it
for some reason when i click the link to my story it says it can't read the code.
someone help? or fix it?

Please don't hesitate to tell me there are problems with the links. ;~; I mess up a lot!

[kairi_angel]

i need work on spoiler tags. I'm in a programming class at my school yet i don't know how to do that.
and I'll keep at it. Practice makes perfect right? anyway how do i use spoiler tags?

[spoilers.]blahblahblah[/.spoilers]
V
blahblahblah

[.spoiler=blah blah]hi.[/spoiler]

Take out the periods in the tags.

[Axel Owns]

+1 imaginary rep for (basically) bringing back the beta reader thread sabby :D

[kairi_angel]

+1 imaginary rep for (basically) bringing back the beta reader thread sabby :D

[Organization_42]

Hey, I don't have time to write out a full-length reply, but I just wanted to say THANK YOU for the awesome critique, Dawninmyheart! It was just what I needed; something very thorough that covered what was good and the things that I needed to improve on. Thank you so much for taking the time to write the critique and for being so helpful! I DEFINITELY want to check this place out more often now.

[Solar]

Just a suggestion because I didn't want to create a new thread but perhaps to increase activity, how about critique trades?

Lots of writers and poets or whatever are unfortunately lazy and/or on some level self-centered (I know I am, no shame in admitting it) but for one reason or another, we don't have much of an incentive to comment or even look at other people's stuff. A critique for a critique might alleviate a lot of problems.

On the other hand, would the job be done quite as good or on a as friendly scale? You people critique pretty selflessly which I think is definitely a factor for success and trades might seem a bit mechanical but I guess this is similar to the public vs. private healthcare debate on a shallow level.

Just something to consider.

[kazukifafner]

I'd like the idea, except the problem is that it would likely turn into little more than a circlejerk between only a few people. Honestly, I think the best thing to do is for some of us "older" members really giving feedback to the section. With any luck, that will spark some give-and-take and increase the activity.

[Solar]

I'd like the idea, except the problem is that it would likely turn into little more than a circlejerk between only a few people. Honestly, I think the best thing to do is for some of us "older" members really giving feedback to the section. With any luck, that will spark some give-and-take and increase the activity.

One thing I've noticed here, and definitely with the younger/newer/less-experienced/more enthusiastic members is this sort of imitation and fixation with the activities of the older members or the higher-ups, the best example I can think of is the dislike some of the younger members have with the mods. What I'm saying is, in this forum, if one person does it, people either emulate in some form of the other or talk about at least. If a couple of people start doing it, then maybe people of different experiences will too and among ourselves and it will develop into a habit and man I'm being idealistic because this section is pretty much dead

[kazukifafner]

Yeah, and honestly, when it comes to just responding to others' posts, I think it would be best to do it in more of an overview fashion. I know that, unless it's specifically asked for, really detailed reviews and grammar policing tend to turn off other members rather quickly. It would probably be better talk more about the style of writing (of course, that's assuming that people, like me, find style to be a fascinating topic), and simply mention recurring grammar problems that might come up (but more in a "watch out for" kind of method).

[kairi_angel]

Just a suggestion because I didn't want to create a new thread but perhaps to increase activity, how about critique trades?

Lots of writers and poets or whatever are unfortunately lazy and/or on some level self-centered (I know I am, no shame in admitting it) but for one reason or another, we don't have much of an incentive to comment or even look at other people's stuff. A critique for a critique might alleviate a lot of problems.

On the other hand, would the job be done quite as good or on a as friendly scale? You people critique pretty selflessly which I think is definitely a factor for success and trades might seem a bit mechanical but I guess this is similar to the public vs. private healthcare debate on a shallow level.

Just something to consider.

I like this idea but at the same time I see it going bad. Some people, I won't lie, are pretty damn bad at critique. I've seen people either say too much, too little or everything in the wrong way. I've turned a couple people down for this group because of that. It might start things between members as well with petty arguing over "I PUT ___ TIME INTO THIS AND YOU JUST GAVE ME A COUPLE SENTENCES" or something stupid like that.

I also don't know how it would be regulated. Critique for critique will also leave people with a lot of shitty ass critiques in an attempt to whore out a story.

It just kind of reminds me of the days of myspace and you'd see COMMENT FOR COMMENT and you'd get like a LOL CUTE and feel obligated to give them one even though their comment is obviously shit.


Mickey, I'll add your link up in a bit.

[Ragnell 37]

Yeah, and honestly, when it comes to just responding to others' posts, I think it would be best to do it in more of an overview fashion. I know that, unless it's specifically asked for, really detailed reviews and grammar policing tend to turn off other members rather quickly. It would probably be better talk more about the style of writing (of course, that's assuming that people, like me, find style to be a fascinating topic), and simply mention recurring grammar problems that might come up (but more in a "watch out for" kind of method).

Yeah, I think that anyone who critiques often has realized that there is a certain portion of the population who does not appreciate having all their mistakes pointed out. Especially since seeing all the little grammatical hiccups pointed out makes things appear worse than they are (everybody misses a period from time to time, or what have you, but seeing them all piled up looks bad). I always feel obligated to remind people in my critiques that I'm majorly nit-picking a lot of the time.

Actually, Annoyance, I think it would be a good idea to add an optional part to the request form indicating how comprehensive they want the critique to be. I usually go through the entire chapter quoting and pointing out every grammatical mistake I see (and of course explaining it if needed) and then I write a bit of my overall impressions and opinions afterward. However, if the person has no desire to see all their individual little mistakes pointed out, and just want more broad pieces of advice, I could save myself a ton of time. That might help get more critiques done. I mean, obviously I am more than happy to give as big a critique as I can, but if it's not going to get read anyway, it would be nice to know ahead of time.

[kairi_angel]

That's why I describe the critic's style in the list, why I have an option for who they want, and an other comments part. D: But I'll tweak it in the morning.

And personally, I like being perfect. Missing a minor mistake to me and then having someone find it for me is just great because it stops me from becoming insane.

[Ragnell 37]

That's why I describe the critic's style in the list, why I have an option for who they want, and an other comments part. D: But I'll tweak it in the morning.

And personally, I like being perfect. Missing a minor mistake to me and then having someone find it for me is just great because it stops me from becoming insane.

I know, haha, me too. I get ticked when I post up a chapter that I've edited for days and read through 100 times, just to find "teh" or half a sentence that I forgot to delete right in the middle. But I've encountered several people who don't care about little mistakes here and there, and just want me to give more plot-based, or less specific grammatical advice. So since we're trying to motivate critiques, I figured we might as well save ourselves a little unnecessary effort. Just an idea, and not honestly that big a deal, since we've got a whole stack of old requests to cover before we worry about new ones anyway. :)