the glittery amazing delicious adventures of khi according to the apostle (teehee just kidding) elle

[Reflection]

Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess by the name of Elle. She woke up one day in the magical land of beavers and decided that today was a good day to have an adventure.

What would she do on this adventure, you ask? Well, it is a legendary story, too immense for the idea of such a demeaning summary, you see.

We begin this tale as Princess Elle skipped off with her best friend Kairi to their sparkly pink gummi ship.

“I need to find my friends!” said Elle. “They’ve been scattered all over the worlds by the evil sorcerer Sam. Can you help me Kairi-chan?” she asked.

Kairi nodded sweetly and they climbed into the gummi ship. She pressed some colorful buttons and the gummi ship grew huge angel wings with the likeness of a CLAMP manga. Princess Elle swooned.

OFF THEY WENT! “Where should we look first? :3” asked Kairi-chan as they swooped up into the sparkly beautiful sky. It looked like the sky in 5 Centimeters Per Second cause that movie has the prettiest skies ever, true story.

“That place looks awesome!!” Princess Elle screamed as she pointed to a glittery planet with the words Wonderland floating in space. Kairi pulled a lever and they went zooming over to it leaving a trail of stardust and cherry blossom petals behind.

They landed in a forest full of huge talking flowers.

“Hi flowers!!!” they both said happily and the flowers bestowed them with valuable potions. And then, all of a sudden, Princess Elle heard a noise!

“PLEASE DON’T, I DON’T TASTE GOOD! I PROMISE!” said a voice that was distinctly sexy and german.

“B-but, you’re…you’re a pie!!” a young girl’s voice responded.
Kairi and Princess Elle peeked around the corner between the leaves and they saw…

…Lennypie and Princess Elle’s long-lost sister Princess Natalie!!

“OMG!” said Princess Elle, and she ran over and hugged her sister. “I have missed you so much, sister!” she said.
“Oh, and you!” replied Princess Natalie. “Have you found our long-lost sister Princess Ken?”
Princess Elle shook her head sadly. “Oh I do miss her, she had the most beautiful hair, I loved to brush it. =w=” she amended with a trivial melancholy.

Lennypie looked slightly alarmed and frightened for his life as he sat on a tree trunk being very pie-like as Princess Natalie and Princess Elle chattered and squealed. Kairi looked at the pie with interest.

“Where did you go? What happened?” asked Princess Elle curiously.

“Well, all I remember is, I was in my room singing along to Twinkle Snow Powdery Snow and then there was a big explosion. This scary mexican named Sam kidnapped me and jumped out the window, but I escaped! I ran into the forest behind my castle estate and then a swirling portal swallowed me up and landed me here next to this talking german pie ;~;” she finished.

Princess Natalie sighed and looked down at her shiny red shoes.

“Don’t worry! We’re going to find everyone!” said Princess Elle, and they nodded.

“Lennypie,” she began, “I know it may be difficult to move around in your current…*ahem*…state, but we need your help too!”

Lennypie gave as much of a determined and intimidating glance to them as was possible as a pie, and Princess Elle giggled and picked him up.

Kairi, Elle, Lennypie and Natalie made a bold stance toward the horizon like this shit was amine.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Okay so where we just left our heroes was the wonderful world of Wonderland: Wonderfully full of wonders.
Since then they had a lunch break of delicious ramen and now we are back!

Meanwhile, in the gummi ship…
“OMGGGG THIS IS SO CUTE!!” Elle freaked out as she tried on an adorable cat girl cosplay in her personal closet of the ship. It was pink and everything was shiny and full of the most high-quality cosplay making materials that could be found in the whole world.

Lennypie sat in the corner reading a magazine about homosexuality, and Princess Natalie was taking a nap on the floor because she was tired.
“OKAY I FOUND ANOTHER WORLD GUYS!! This time it’s a jungle called Brazil.” said Kairi.

Princess Elle jumped up with glee and looked just like this- :3

“That means Paolo-kun will be there!” she said happily and twirled around the cabin of the ship.

Natalie woke up and started petting Lennypie. He purred.

“So that means we have to get ready!” said Elle with a determined grin, and she got out a slicy-looking weapon to cut the huge jungle plants with.
Kairi nodded. And then a look of astute horror came over her face as she looked out the windshield and saw…

…a flying hobo in space!!

It crashed into the gummi ship and sent everyone flying, but Princess Elle saved Lennypie from smushing on the floor because she has amazing reflexes.

“HI I’M CHRISTINA!!!” the hobo said.

~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The group was now five! Everyone was happy to find their perverted friend Christina because she was soooo cool. Like really.

After everyone prepared for the trek in the massive poverty-ridden third world country that was home to their friend Paolo, Kairi landed the gummi ship on the edge of a gorgeous beach.

There were lots of evil monkeys and dwarves in the jungle so Princess Elle threw rocks at them. The dwarf king in particular was very feisty, his name was Eric and he was the tallest of the dwarves at 4 whole feet. O:

Princess Nat-chan threw Elle a sword and she dueled with the king of the dwarves valiantly! Jabbing near and far, clashes of steel filled the jungle! It was so exciting!

And then Princess Elle stabbed him because she was tired of it.

A few meters over, lying on the ground, there was a lump. A sleeping lump. Christina poked it with a stick and it made a dying noise.

“I bet it’s Paolo-kun,” said Elle. Natalie nodded and they snuck over to him quietly.

“…Paolo-kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnn….we’re going on an advennnnnntuuuuuure Paolo-kuuuuuuuuunn…” crooned Princess Elle.

“Yeahhhh, an adventuuuuuuure Paolo-kuuuuuuuuuun,” Princess Natalie added.

Paolo-kun looked up and glared at them both, which made Princess Elle giggle.

“Yayyy we found you!” she cheered.

Then they all had a meeting at the Red Lobster to discuss the noble quest they had begun to destroy the evil sorcerer Sam and his mean cronies.

The waiter’s name was Callum.

“So what do you guys know about this Sam?” asked the Lennypie.

Paolo-kun answered gruffly, “he is the leader of an organization. Organization Power Hungry Power Corrupt. >:c It is an extremely dangerous group of assassins and terrorists, and must be avoided at all costs!”

Princess Natalie nodded.

“We need as many people to help us as possible to take on this ordeal, don’t we?! We need to find the rest of Elle’s friends!” Princess Natalie announced, the red ribbon in her hair bouncing. Elle’s eyes lit up and she pulled on it because it was pretty.

Paolo sighed. “Do I have to come with? <_<” he said, yes, including the less than sign underscore less than sign.

“OF COURSE YOU DO!!” Princess Elle glared at him. “You are coming along because you have experience in hunting panthers. This is the same idea. >:c” she said like the feisty Latina girl she wished she was.

Paolo sighed and agreed to help, and Christina tripped an old guy walking around the restaurant. Lennypie giggled.

After they had finished, they returned to the gummi ship, and Princess Elle directed Kairi to the nearest planet to begin their adventures again!

~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~

In another time, and another place, President Brock Obama sighed as he signed another bill, tired of his job already.

The current world our heroes in was The Land of Sparkly Shit. It was so full of sparkles, Elle almost had a heart attack. She was in heaven, so very much so that she had sprouted fairy wings.

Everyone was like O:

So Elle sprinkled them with fairy dust and they all grew wings!

They flew around the land of sparkly shit looking for their friends together.

Somewhere in the southwestern corner of the planet, Paolo spotted someone walking around looking quite confused.
“IT’S TAYTAY!!!” Elle shouted. “HI TAYTAY!!!”

Taytay looked like he wanted to kill himself.

They floated down and began to talk to him. “Hi guys.” he said sadly. :C

“Did you get asploded out of your world by Sam too?” asked Princess Natalie.

He was going to answer but Christina turned around and pointed at a girl coming up to them.

“Hello! Are you from here, or are you visitors?” she asked.
She was wearing a pleated skirt, had big plastic boots and long blonde hair in pigtails.

“SAILOR MOON?!” Elle squealed. “OMG!!<33”

Sailor Moon nodded and acknowledged all of Princess Elle’s friends.

“We’re on an adventure to find the rest of my comrades, Sailor Moon! We plan on taking down the evil Organization Power Hungry Power Corrupt and defeating their mastermind sorcerer Sam. Could you help us?”

Sailor Moon looked at them endearingly and decided to bestow them with unique and powerful weapons, made straight from each and every person’s heart.

They were gold lockets, and she made one for every one of Elle’s friends. She gave Princess Elle the lockets for the missing ones to give them when she found them, and handed out the rest of them to the current party.

Paolo and Taytay looked at them with distaste but Princess Natalie slapped them with a newspaper and made them put the lockets on.

“This is just like a shoujo anime!!!” Princess Elle squealed. She pressed a switch on the locket and a super cool sparkly transformation scene began. Ribbons and glittery bubbles flew all over and dressed her up like a pink Sailor Scout.

Taytay and Paolo both got to wear tuxedos and monocles like classy gentlemen, and everyone looked gorgeous and color-coded. Like this shit was amine. Oh yeah.

One of the coolest features of everyone’s new toys was the guardian fairies that came out of the lockets.
Everyone had their own fairies. Princess Elle’s was named Coolfresh, and he was this gangsta boy who protected her from evil by shooting people with his magic glock.

Lennypie had a fairy from the U.K. named Pino bb, and she had a big attitude problem, so she could ninja kick anyone who tried to take the pie.

Princess Natalie’s was a ginger named Eddie who ate people’s souls and used fiyah magic.

Paolo’s was a snazzy-looking kid from Maine named Ningy-kun, who had the best fashion advice around and Taytay’s was a beautiful princess named Livi-chan who could make an enemy keel over and die by just winking at them with her charms~

Christina had a fairy named Palmer but she ate him. So um.

After that everyone went to Japan to go to a Perfume concert! It was tons of fun. Princess Natalie got Nocchi’s autograph and a hug and pictures and Princess Elle got to meet A~chan. Kashiyuka gave Christina one of her cute hats and they all chattered together happily with Perfume!<333

Afterward they wandered around the streets of Tokyo and saw many things like cute little Asian girls like aquaxion and a man that looked suspiciously like Alexx following them creepily.

Princess Elle almost got raped by ugly old pedos but Taytay turned into Tayzaku and spinkicked them into 3000 b.c. where they were eaten by Mesopotamian nomads.

“I think it’s time to go to Pirate Land.” said Princess Elle. So they returned to the sparkly winged gummi ship and flew off.

The first thing that everyone noticed was the positive air of the world, such happy music bursted from each and every corner and made them all want to dance, except for Paolo, because Paolo is too cool for dancing.

Suddenly Elle saw her friend Steve the Pirate!
“Sup homie gs” said Steve the Pirate.
“Hello!” responded Princess Elle and her friends. Steve the Pirate had a hook for a hand and he looked quite dangerous.

“Can we interest you in joining our noble quest?” asked Taytay.

Steve the Pirate agreed, a twinkle in his eye, but they couldn’t see it because he had an eyepatch on.

The next world they went to was Fanclubtown. It was full of friendly and slightly retarded people but it was an all-around OK place. The shy princess of Fanclubtown, Princess Jennipants, slinked around the corners drawing cute pictures for her friends.

Normally the quiet town was nice and peaceful, flowers blooming in various places, but at the moment it was being terrorized by Organization Power Hungry Power Corrupt!!

Paolo recognized them immediately, and he strapped on a jetpack to go fight evil.

A guy in a big fluffy bear costume was walking around suspiciously so Taytay laser-beamed it off, and underneath was…Gildragon!

Gildragon agreed to help fight evil with Princess Elle and her friends and so he used the power of his dental hygiene to defeat the minions of the Organization.

Princess Elle and Princess Natalie transformed into Sailor Scouts and Christina threw rocks at Sam’s head. Unfortunately it was not enough so they all had to chase him into the sky, where they faced off for the final battle.

“Hahaha!! you will never stop me!!!” said the evil Mexican Sam.

“Yes we will!” said Elle and all her friends. “The power of friendship solves everything!!” They struck a pose in their sailor scout uniforms and Elle slowly raised Lennypie into the air.

“I’m sorry, Lenny…” she said sadly.

“It’s okay. I’m willing to be sacrificed!!” he said heroically.

She pulled her arm back and threw Lennypie with as much force as she could muster, and he sailed on the wind, shouting, “I’LL COME BACK TO YOU!!! I PROMISE!!!”

The Lennypie smashed into the evil sorcerer Sam’s face with an explosion. They looked on with tears in their eyes for the poor pie as Sam melted, crying out a requiem for his failed plans.

Princess Elle stomped on his remains with her pink boots and grinded them into the floor and then brb’d because she had to finish her chemistry homework.

special thanks to
lennypie (leonard)
natalie (lolita)
and everyone who gave me ideas

111111ɐ noʎ sǝʌo1 ǝ11ǝ ǝǝǝǝssıɯoɹd .ıɥʞ ɟo sɹǝqɯǝɯ ǝɥʇ ɥʇıʍ buıʇɔɐɹǝʇuı ɟo ʎɐʍ pǝ11ıʍ-11ı ɹǝɥʇo ʎuɐ ɹo 'ʇ1nsuı 'ssɐɹɐɥ oʇ pǝpuǝʇuı ʎɐʍ ou uı sı ʇı puɐ ʎɹoʇs sıɥʇ uı ǝuoʎɹǝʌǝ ǝʌo1 ı :ɹǝɯıɐ1ɔsıp

[Araliya]

this... this is so beautiful c:

[Reflection]

like our avatars <3

i'm so sad christina's not on to see it sadklfjdsakl;fdsg

[Lolita]

*UUU* BRAVA<333333
im so cool with my red ribbon ;3;

[scubasteve]

>The dwarf king in particular was very feisty, his name was Eric and he was the tallest of the dwarves at 4 whole feet. O:

i chuckled pretty hard actually

also how the fuck do you eat a palmer

[Reflection]

i'm going to try and get everyone on khi into this next chapter with lots of interaction! so don't be disappointed if you weren't in this chapter!!
also spoilers: the pie always comes back

[gramp anime scholar]

Originally Posted by scubasteve

i chuckled pretty hard actually

you and me both man, you and me both.

[Monkey]

xDD cant wait to read more

[User Name]

I better have an important role.

[Lycanthrope]

If I am not introduced as a full-fledged hippie ginger werewolf in the next chapter I will frown down upon you

[Shinkirō]

fuck you all, i'm a waiter c:

[Leonard]

Originally Posted by Reflection

Lennypie sat in the corner reading a magazine about homosexuality

being a pie feels good man

[Massive Attack]

i like how i'm in this haha!

[Crimson]

I've always wanted to be the princess of Fanclubtown. <3
Love you, Ellepants! 8D

[Reflection]

Originally Posted by Massive Attack

i like how i'm in this haha!

i'm sorry i'm sorry i promise you'll make an appearance next chapter ;-; i had dance all this weekend and asdkjfdkslf