purple and blue and orange

[Riel]

The sky was purple and blue and orange, but mainly it was just orange and the sun was setting. He was sitting with his arm around her and she was leaning into his side, and somehow in their position they still even managed to hold hands. The water rose and lapped and crashed, and little ripples would form because he threw small rocks into the surface.

'I wish things could be like this forever' he said and she looked at him and nodded her head and agreed. He looked over the ocean and kept his arm around her, and people walked behind them and looked at them and made little comments, and she would always blush a little bit at all of their comments.

'You make me the happiest boy in the world' he said, and she looked up with her green eyes to stare into his brown eyes, and he looked back at her, and they both sat there like that for a long time.

And then she agreed, and he threw his head back and laughed, and he almost fell right into the ocean because he was laughing so hard.

'What is so funny?' she asked, and he just laughed and laughed and tried to stop but he couldn't. He covered his mouth with his hand and looked at the sunset, but he couldn't stop laughing and she started to blush even harder and she pushed him away a little bit and began to pout.

'Aww, come on' he said, and he tried to put his arm back around her, but she wouldn't let him and that made him sad. He sat there for a minute and pouted and wondered what was wrong and then she turned at him and saw he was pouting and she put his arm back around her.

'I was just thinking about how you agreed to being the happiest boy, babe' he said. She looked at him and called him an idiot and then laughed too, and then they both stared off and looked at the sky that was purple and blue and orange, but mainly just orange.

[Audo]

Cheesy dialogue is cheesy.

[Riel]

lol, I know, right?

[∞]

I liked the old title better.

[Audo]

You should work on that.

[Riel]

Originally Posted by ∞

I liked the old title better.

lol, that's not surprising. BUT IT WAS INAPPROPRIATE.

>You should work on that

Yeah sure k why not yeah let's do that

[Audo]

I don't like it. It's short. The dialogue is cheesy. And not so much the good kind of cheesy (a la "Grey." where it's done mockingly) but the bad kind of cheesy where it comes off more as you trying to do normal, unemo dialogue and failing.

People can talk normally, and not be emo or depressing yet still not be balls of prozac-fed rainbows on a sunny day hanging out with Barnie and Friends.

If it weren't for the framing, it wouldn't even feel like a bit of a story at all. It's somewhat lacking in purpose. Try again.

[Riel]

NO .